It was Cooper.
I didn’t call him, but I wanted to.
It’s a win I was looking for since I got here, and if all goes well, it means I could see the shop getcloseto turning a profit for the year.
I grab my phone and call Mom. It’s been a while and I need to hear her voice. Sometimes she doesn’t keep her phone close, and it takes her a bit to get up and get to it. It goes to voicemail, so I hang up and call again.
It rings a couple of times. “Hi sweetheart, I’m sorry it took me so long.”
“Hi Mom.”
“It’s been a while. I’m glad you’ve taken some time for yourself,” she says.
I look out the window of the shop and my chin quivers. “I miss you both. How are you? How’s Dad?”
“Oh, I’m just fine. Your father is at work, but he’s doing well.”
My chest tightens, and I rub the sharp pain. “Are you sure? No flare-ups?”
“No, actually, we’ve been doing okay. So tell me, what’s up with you? I talked to Francesca yesterday. She said you hadn’t called her, so we both assumed things were going well.”
Tears well in my eyes, and I let them fall, thankful she can’t see me. “I’m at the shop getting ready for a delivery. It’s been a lot, but I’ve made some changes that I hope will work out in the long run.”
“That’s good. How is everything else? Did you make any friends?”
I huff and brush my hand against my cheek. “Yeah, I did. A few of them actually.”
She’s quiet for a moment, then says, “I can hear the tears in your voice, Mae. What’s going on?”
“Mom, I met someone, and I don’t know what to do,” I sob.
“That’s wonderful, sweetheart. But why does that make you cry?”
What I wouldn’t give to have a hug from my mom.
“Because I’m here for less than a year and I’m way too deep, and it’s only going to break my heart, and I think his too.”
My mom sighs. “I know you’ve had a rough go of things for years now. But, sweetheart, maybe it’s time you go all in. Let things play out, then you can decide.”
“I’ve already done that and I’m…” I pause, taking a breath. “Mom, I can … Iwantto see a future with him. But…”
“Mae, nothing is written in stone. At least not yet. You have such a beautiful, giving heart. And if you’re in that deep with this man, then he probably see’s that too.”
“But what do I do?” I beg her.
“You give each other a chance, tesoro. You allow yourself not to think about the what - ifs, and you stop looking at the calendar, and you let yourselflive.Let yourself thrive. I know you’re worried, but I promise you we’re good. This is a great opportunity for you to go headfirst and see what happens.”
“But what if it doesn’t work out?” I ask her.
“Then it doesn’t, and after you finish your year at the shop. You pack up and come home,” she says, as if it’s that simple.
“We can’t be so afraid of getting hurt that we prevent ourselves from experiencing life, Mae. Part of me wonders with my … illness that I’ve prevented you from that and—”
“Mom, no, I love to help you. I’m happy to do it. I—”
“Mae, I’m not your responsibility. Though I love that you help me the way you do and care for me. I want my daughter to experience things. To fall in love. To get back up if she gets hurt and try again. I want my sweet little girl to have the life that she’s dreamed of. But you won’t find it here, helping me. That’s why I want you to take this opportunity by the horns and ride it. See what happens, and if it doesn’t work, that’s okay because I’ll be here,” she says.
“I’m falling for him,” I rasp.
