Sitting there in the dirt on my ass, covered in sweat, tears, and vomit, I watch as Sunny walks back over to the blanket she has spread out under a large tree and picks up her book.I’m too stunned to speak, and I don’t know if it’s because of her or the rollercoaster that is my mental state right now.I draw my knees towards my chest, embrace them with my arms, and rest my head, letting my thoughts wander.I allow the box with my past crammed in it at the back of my mind to open, just enough to remember what is at stake if I don’t keep my shit together ...my life!
Five
Blitz
I’m beyond pissed at Token right now.It is no goddamn secret that I do not like to fly.That doesn’t mean the motherfucker needs to drug my ass.We touched down in Tucson, and I hardly remember getting my ass off the plane.Rhino and Token guided me through the airport and out to meet Short from the Arizona chapter.We climb into the SUV and I lay my head back, trying to get my rolling stomach and fucked head under control.
Pulling my phone from my pocket, I check to see if Charlie has replied to my text message.My heart stutters slightly when I find there isn’t a reply from her.Anger and worry burn my gut, causing all the drinks to turn sour.She always messages me back when I’m away.The swaying of the car and me reading on my phone is causing my head to spin and stomach to roll, so I lay my head back and close my eyes.Not at all surprised when my thoughts go to the woman who haunts my every waking moment—hell, even my dreams.
I must pass out because the next thing I know I’m being shaken awake as we pull up to what’s left of our Arizona brother’s clubhouse.We slide out of the SUV, and I growl because I’m still unsteady on my feet.The guys heard me into a building where, thank God, there is fucking AC.I fall back onto the couch, while squinting at Token.
“Token, I’m going to kick your fucking ass for this,” I snap.
He smirks at me before shrugging.“Shouldn’t be such a little bitch when it comes to flying.”
Along with the California chapter, we spend the next two weeks helping the Arizona chapter rebuild their bunkhouse.I’ve texted Charlie a dozen times, and with every unanswered message, my stress and anxiety grow.Add in the unrest due to whatever the bitch Shea had to say, and I’m fighting every molecule in me not to take off for home to make sure that she is okay.As far as I know, they haven’t found out anything that could lead to Charlie being caught in the crosshairs of the shit-show going down.
As we get ready to leave Arizona, Token comes to me with his hand out and two gummies lying on his palm.I eye the gummies for a long time before biting the bullet and taking them.We make it through security with no issues and head to our gate.Sitting at our gate waiting, the gummies start to take effect and I’m feeling okay until the moment the door closes.Yep, I cannot fucking do this.
I move to stand from my seat when Rhino’s hand lands on my shoulder.“Sit the fuck down.Once we’re in the air, we’ll get you a drink.If you cannot do that, a well-placed pressure point jab will put you out.You fucking decide.”
Rumbling low in my chest, I reply, “You might as well knock me the fuck out.”
“Sleeping Beauty, your wish is my command,” Rhino chuckles.
The very next thing I know is people standing to get off the plane.I stretch my neck, trying to work out the kinks from being in a single position for a long time.
“Take a good nap?”Rhino smirks.
“Fuck you.”I flip him off as we stand grabbing our bags from the overhead compartment.
The need to get to Charlie sweeps away all drowsiness.As we make our way through the airport, I relax at being home.We make it outside to find Twitch leaning against one of our blacked-out SUVs.After a round of one-armed man hugs, we slide our cuts off and climb into Token behind the wheel.Pulling my phone from my pocket, I check once again for a message from Charlie, and when I don’t find one, I shoot her a message:
ME: Charlie, I’ll be home soon.You had better have a good reason for not answering me.
I have to bite my tongue so hard I taste blood to keep from interrogating Twitch about Charlie.It only takes us about thirty minutes to pull up to the gate at the clubhouse and what greats me has me groaning and pissed as hell.Rhino glances at me with a matching expression on his face.
“Why didn’t you tell us we were coming home to an open club party?”Token snaps.
Twitch shrugs.“Not my information to tell.Seems secrets are still the way of the club.”
The way he says his words causes the radar in my head to go off.The need to find Charlie is now riding me so hard that I’m starting to vibrate.I am not in the mood for this shit after being gone for two fucking weeks.I can't even begin to recognize the multitude of cars and bikes filling the parking lot.Token eventually finds a spot for the SUV.The smoke from a bonfire fills the air, and the steady boom of the music from inside the clubhousedrifts to us as we open the doors.Sliding out, I pull on my cut and leave my bag for Twitch to deal with.Making my way to the front of the clubhouse, I pull the door open, searching the crowd for the only person who matters.
As I make it through the room, shaking hands and speaking to those who speak to me, I never stop searching for her.Every second I don’t see her causes my heart rate to kick up.My anxiety grows as Twitch’s words ring in my ears.The bar is standing room only, and I have to fight my way to the bar.I finally make it and don’t even fight the growl that surges from deep in my chest when I find Sunny working her ass off with Anvil working right along with her.It doesn’t take long for them to catch sight of me.
Anvil’s eyes meet mine, narrowing before he makes his way over to me, “Blitz, it’s good to see you guys made it back safe!”
“Safe is a relative term,” I answer.“Little surprised to see you behind the bar on a night like tonight.”
“It appears we lost a bartender about an hour ago,” Anvil’s tone is accusatory.
My heart turns to stone with his words, “What the fuck do you mean you lost a bartender?Where the hell is Charlie?”
“That’s what we’d like to fucking know.If you find her, let her know Raider is fucking pissed, and she has a lot to explain.”
I spin around, pushing back through the crowd, scanning every face I pass, searching for Charlie.I circle the great room four times before checking the kitchen, bathrooms, and even her fucking room.Each lap, each room that I don’t find her sends me closer to the fucking edge.What I cannot figure out is why I’m so fucking obsessed with her.I went and saved her when the call came in.She was also one of my oldest friend’s woman.To fall for her would do nothing but betray him as well as my brothers.Pushing through the back door, I take in the scene before me.
There are people everywhere—by the pool, crowding the outdoor kitchen and picnic area—the bonfire is lit, and it looks like there are a few people playing a game of baseball.Raider had a field built for his son River.I walk every inch of the property, searching.A cold, crawling fear wraps itself around me, getting tighter and tighter with every second I don’t find her.It’s when I’m taking one final lap around before I sound the alarm that I decide to go closer to the lake.As the path opens onto the sandy area, I come to a stop when two figures come into view.
