Me: God dammit.
Me: Why aren’t you answering?
Luca: Sorry. I forgot you took yourself out of there the last time I pissed you off. Adding you back in now.
Me: NO!!
Luca Santo has added Leo Santo to the chat.
Me: God dammit.
Dom: Oh, how the mighty have fallen!
Dom: This may be the best day of my life.
Alex: I thought that was when you married Kate.
Dom: She’ll understand.
Me: Whatdid he tell you?
Luca: I didn’t TELL them anything.
Alex: Screenshots are forever, my guy.
Sebastian: I haven’t been married into this family for that long, but this seems like a really unhealthy relationship between all of you.
Travis: You get used to it.
Stone: No, you don’t.
Stone: I’ve tried to leave, but short of blocking every last one of these assholes, Luca keeps putting me back in here.
Me: You guys can get a divorce. I’m forced into this by blood.
Dom: Well, we can’t get to helping you with advice until you tell us who the lucky lady is. Someone we might know?
Me: Does that detail really matter?
Alex: It does if it’s who we think it is.
Travis: IT’S ELLA! Gianna confirmed.
Me: What the fuck?
Me: She went to my sister to gab about this? Fucking hell.
Me: Couldn’t she have gone to anyone else? Now I can’t look G in the eye. Hell, I can’t look any of you in the eyes.
Luca: Trav, did Ella complain about anything?
Travis: According to G, it was “hot as hell” and she was “unprepared for it,” whatever that means.
Me: It means I literally started jerking off, talked out loud like it was Ella, she heard, and then I came.
Dom: Seriously. Best day of my life.
Luca: I feel awful for your wife and children, Dom. Like … really awful.
