Chapter One
Chaos…
"Fucking cocksuckers!” I can’t believe Rod would let them do this to us…to me. “The fucking scumbags want to send a writer tohelpme write our songs?”
“Who the fuck wants to do what?” Wrath asked. I looked up from reading the text to see him grab a beer from the mini-fridge and drop onto the couch.
“Our fucking manager is letting the record company hire a songwriter for the new album. They don’t think my songs are good enough.” Each word I read pissed me off more. Who the hell were they to tell me my lyrics weren’t good enough. The anger radiated through me and the desire to punch something was overwhelming. Tossing the phone on the table, I slammed my fist through the wall.Shit.Okay, maybe that wasn’t the best idea I’d had all day, but at least we could afford the damage. I didn’t know if it was the stress from the tour or what, but lately I’d lost patience with everything. Two months ago I would havebeen fuckin’ pissed but not to the point of putting my fist through the wall.
Looking at my scraped knuckles, I wanted to laugh. I’d done so much worse to myself over the years, but this was just stupid. “We should’ve never signed the fucking contract. All you ever hear is how record companies fuck you over.”
“Will you fucking tell me what’s going on already? Or do I have to beat it out of you?” Wrath growled at me.
Turning from the hole in the wall, six sets of eyes were staring at me. They were all there, the band—my family—looking at me like I’d grown a second head. Not surprising since I’ve always been the most level headed of the group, but this just fucking sucked. It was our sound, our stories. I sighed as I jammed the cell in my jeans, knowing I had ‘pissed off’ written all over my face. They waited to see what was coming next, curiosity and concern in their eyes and on Rage’s face—anger. His name fuckin’ nailed his personality to a ‘T’.
I don't know when I became the ‘leader’ of the band and our little family. One day I just realized it had happened, andsometimes, like today, the responsibility was just too fuckin’ much. “Symmetry doesn’t think my songs are good enough forBlown Away. They contacted Rod and he texted to let me know they hired a songwriter and he’s coming over to meet us today.”
Looking at my hand resting on the edge of the table, I watched blood seep from the scrapes. Grabbing a towel I wrapped it around my knuckles. Rehearsal was gonna suck later but oh fucking well.
Rage was the first to object, but no surprise there. “They didn’t have a problem with the fucking songs when we went triple platinum in a month with the first one.”
“Nope, they didn’t, but now they think they know what our fans want better than we do.”
Fury grabbed some beers and tossed them around the room, offering one to me, but I shook my head. I needed more than beer, I was too pissed off and I didn’t give a shit if it was only eleven a.m. “Nah, I’m thinking scotch if they stocked it for us.”
Fury started to get up but Sweets pushed him down. “I’ll get it for you. No worries.”
“Thanks.” Sweets was like a little sister to me but lately things with her had gotten a little strange. She and her sister are the backup singers for Raining Chaos. They’d come to live at the Sherman’s after the rest of us had already been there for a while, but we’d all gotten along great. When we started the band they’d wanted to help. We let them sing backup, and they’ve been part of the band ever since.
It hadn’t been easy in the beginning. We’d traveled around in a fucked up van for five long years—tons of crappy food and showering in truck stops, but it had finally paid off. The gig at the Leaky Keg in Boston changed everything. There were still lots of times I couldn’t fucking believe we’d made it this far. Five guys from the foster system—and now here we were, starting our first worldwide tour and working on our second album. What a fuckin’ trip, which was the only reason I wasn’t going to kick Rod’s ass when he got there.
“So what did you tell Rod, bro?” Flame asked as he grabbed another beer.
I shrugged my shoulders as I watched Sweets look for the scotch. I hoped they’dput some in here for us. She finally pulled a bottle out of a cabinet and held up a glass, but I shook my head. The bottle would work just fine. We had the show later but I’d have time to sober up, besides my hand was starting to ache and swell. Hopefully the alcohol would numb it and my anger too.
“Yo?” Wrath tossed a pillow at me but it went wide and hit the wall, sliding to the floor.
“You missed mother fucker.” I laughed. “I wanted to tell him to let them know we said they could go fuck themselves, but he made it pretty clear we didn’t have a choice. Fucking contracts.”
“Goddamn it. We want to play our own music, Chaos. It’s been good enough so far,” Fury said, his voice deep and angry.
“I agree, so we’re going to have to figure out a way to make sure the writer agrees with us. I’m hoping whoever they sent has at least heard our shit. Then we can convince him to go back and tell them the music is great. Or maybe we could get the girls to be extra nice to him.” Seeing the looks on their faces told me they didn’t get the joke.
“Holy fuck. I was joking. You don’t actually think I’d pimp you out do you?”
Candy shook her head but Sweets was staring at me with a weird expression on her face. I was going to have to talk to her soon and find out what the hell was up with her. She’d always been on the moody side but this was getting fuckin’ ridiculous.
“Do we all agree? We’ll do what we need to do to get the writer to go along with our songs?”
“Yeah,” echoed around the room from each of them. We could be pretty persuasive if we needed to be, and with any luck he’d be a fan.
“Rod also said he sent us an email with the tour schedule—at least the first part of it. I still can’t fuckin’ believe we’re opening for Avenged Sevenfold at the Garden. So tonight will be the last small club we’ll play at for a long time, hell maybe ever, and we need to rock our fuckin’ asses off and give them something to remember. Besides, Jack and Sally are coming too.”
Lifting the bottle of scotch I took a long drink. The sting of the liquor as it burned its way down my throat eased some of thetension in my shoulders. I didn’t drink a lot but sometimes it was the only way to keep my sanity and chase away the demons when they got too close.
The buzz of another text message interrupted my thoughts. Rod again. He sure lived up to his name; he was a real fuckin’ dick when he wanted to be. I was starting to wonder if he was doing his best for us. Lately it seemed a lot like he was only in it for the money. The songwriter wasn’t the first thing he’d caved in on to the record company.
Rod:We’ll be there in fifteen. Try to behave.
