I froze in place. My heart raced, and my face grew hot. I tried to blink E away, but my eyes wouldn’t move. He was coming from the back room—the one that was dimly lit and housed the pool tables. How long he’d been at the bar, I didn’t know. But the room buzzed with his presence, and I felt shaky and numb as I tried to plan the quickest escape I could find. In the next second, I placed my still-full beer down, threw a twenty on the bar, and made my way to the front door in what must have looked like a crooked walking sprint.
I made it out, seemingly unscathed, and beelined it to Mom’s car in the parking lot across the street. But when I couldn’t find the key that was already in my hand, I realized I was too buzzed to drive.
Which meant I’d have to call a cab.
And wait. Like a sitting duck.
It was barely a minute after my untimely defeat that I heard the door screech open behind me. I didn’t dare look back. I prayed it was someone else. Anyone but E. A stranger, God willing. But I’d have no such luck.
“Sydney!” he called out, his voice rich and deep and resonant.
I slammed my eyes shut, and my breath grew shallow immediately.Fuck.
FuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuck.
“You come to town, and you don’t even tell me?!” He yelled into the dark lot as he made his way toward me.
He sounded annoyed. Frustrated. Angry. And drunk. And I knew all too well why.
Somewhere deep inside, I drummed up the courage to face him. Call it beer balls, or better yet, tequila testicles.
I turned around and half-yelled back. “I’m only here for the weekend. Didn’t think I’d have the time.”
He stopped right in front of me, and I could see the drunkenness in his stance. “So? You just gonna pop in and out and not even say hello?”
I took a shaky breath and tried to sound strong. “Yes. I’m clean now… so.”
His brows knitted together as he jerked his head back. “What the hell does that mean?”
I looked away and then back at him, trying my best to seem inconvenienced by our exchange rather than intimidated by it, full of a bleeding heart, like I truly was.
“It means I’m making better choices now. No more mistakes.”
His brows shot up, and his eyes widened. “Is that what it was?” He patronized as he took a step toward me. “A mistake?”
He hissed that last part, and I could feel his bitterness in every syllable.
He leaned in close, and I took a small step back, leaving my back against an empty pickup truck. He brought his face inches from mine, the smell of beer and whiskey emanating from his breath. His hands framed my face on either side as he towered over me. His voice darkened, and my thighs clenched together at the sound of it.
“It didn’tfeellike a mistake when your tongue was down my throat. It didn’tfeellike a mistake when mine was all over you.”
I gritted my teeth and swallowed down the heat that was rising in me. I tried to forget the way his hands felt against me, powerful and demanding. The curve of his strong, defined chest under my fingertips. The feel of his warm, wet tongue over my breasts… But he saw right through me.
“Yeah,” he let out a snarky breath through his nostrils as he moved backward. “That’s what I thought.”
My breath shuddered as he moved his hands down to his sides. His expression softened then, and for the first time, I saw it—the hurt I had caused him when I disappeared.
“Why, Syd?”
I didn’t say a word. Too lost in my drunken mind that was swimming. Too sad in my broken heart to find words. Too swollen in the sea of lust I still felt and was trying hard to drown out.
“Answer me.” It wasn’t a request.
“I had to,” I croaked out, and my voice cracked. “I couldn’t risk—”
“Couldn’t risk what? Your relationship—your preciousJake?” He said it with such disgust; the saliva went sour in my mouth.
“You couldn’t risk him, but you could risk me?” His voice was rising, dripping with agony, and I could feel his pain in my bones. The betrayal.
