“They… they aren’t going ahead.”
It took me a long minute – longer than I wanted to admit – to figure out what she was talking about.So much had been going on today, and selfishly, all of it was about me.There was a second where some stupid part of my brain actually thought she might be talking about the new Ridley Angus deal.
“The pilot?”I asked.I felt the breath whooshing out of me.That was her dream.
“Yeah,” she said, her voice breaking into sobs.“The producers just called.They’re going with another concept, they said.”
I put one hand against my forehead, slumping with my elbow against the desk.“Can they do that?”
“We didn’t actually sign any contracts yet,” she said.“It was all just a verbal agreement.They can do whatever they want.I thought they were calling to set up the meeting so we could sign.”
“Oh, Clara…” I closed my eyes for a moment.Everything else seemed unimportant right now.There was no way I was going to tell her my happy news, even if Olly wasn’t listening in.She was devastated.Broken.“I’m so sorry.”
“I shouldn’t have let myself get so excited,” she said with a sob.“I really believed it was happening, but it’s never…”
“It’s going to happen!”I cut her off.“Don’t ever stop believing that it will.I believe in you, Clara.I do.You’re going to get this.It’s just a matter of time.”
“But the money…” she said.“That money would have changed everything.”
“I’m bringing in a wage,” I told her.And my job was safe – not that she ever knew it had been in jeopardy.“Don’t worry about that.Clara, look how close you got.”
“I know,” she wailed, sniffing even harder.
“No, I mean, look how close,” I said.“That means you have it.Don’t you see what that means?They were going to take a shot on you.So they changed their minds.That’s fine.It still means that they saw your potential.Someone else will see it again, and next time, it won’t fall through.It’s going to happen for you.I promise.”
“I just…” she broke off into tears for a few moments, during which I bit my lip and put my hand over my heart, convinced I could actually feel it breaking for her.I wished I was there with her in person so that I could give her a hug, but the next best thing I could do was to listen to her.“I’m going to call Nando.”
“Okay,” I said.I sighed.I wasn’t convinced he was the best person to lean on in hard times, but she had to find that out for herself.I knew from experience that she was never going to listen to her big brother in matters of the heart.“Call me back if you need to.I’ll see you tonight.”
She only sniffed a couple of times and then hung up the phone.
I glanced up.
“Tonight?”Olly said.
“My sister,” I explained.“She’s having a hard time.Why?”
He cleared his throat and looked down.
I grinned.
“Did you want to spend some time with me tonight?”
“Shut up and do some work,” Olly said.
“Okay,” I said.“Whatever you say, sir.”
And I knew my words had hit their mark when he growled at me, adjusted his tie like he was struggling to get enough air, and scowled across the room with the kind of look that, just a few hours ago, would have terrified me to the marrow of my bones.
Olly
There was so much we hadn’t figured out.
I couldn’t help glancing across the room at Keaton every few minutes.A new thought crossed my mind each time.Would he want to tell people?How fast should we go?Did he still really want to be my secretary?For how long?Was he thinking he would get a promotion out of this?That was an unkind thought.Did he mind who I was?What I was like?Would he want me to change?
Things we needed to talk about.Things that couldn’t be spoken.So many of them swirled around inside my head that I thought I might be losing my mind.
At least losing my mind for Keaton was better than never having kissed him at all.
