But the words won't come.
Instead, I just stand there, phone clutched in my hand, curtains drawn tight, feeling the weight of everything pressing down.
Tomorrow, I tell myself.Tomorrow I'll tell him.
Because I'm done carrying this alone.
I'm done pretending I don't need him.
Declan's still out there.
But so is Tank.
And for the first time, I think maybe that's enough to keep me standing.
13
TANK
Idon't sleep.
I just lie in bed staring at the ceiling, mind stuck on a loop I can't break.Enya leaning into me the other day, her face pressed against my chest.The way her whole body shook when she finally let herself cry.
The way she whisperedI'm scaredlike it was the hardest thing she'd ever said.
And the way it felt when she grabbed my wrist and asked me not to leave yet.
Like something fundamental shifted between us.
I check my phone for the tenth time in an hour.Nothing.No messages.No calls.Just the text I sent her yesterday afternoon asking if she was alright, and her brief reply that she was home with Warren and her mam.
Radio silence since then.
I want to text again.I want to call.I want to ride over to her flat and make sure she's okay, that Declan hasn't shown up, that she's sleeping and safe and not spiraling alone.
But I can't.
She needs space.Time to process.And I need to respect that even though every instinct I have is screaming to get closer, to protect, to make sure nothing touches her.
I drag myself out of bed around six, giving up on sleep entirely.I shower under water too hot, trying to wash away the restless energy crawling under my skin.Doesn't work.Nothing works.
Just keeps coming back to her.
The fear in her eyes.The way she described Declan.Patient.Calculated.Watching and waiting until she's scared enough.
My jaw clenches so hard my teeth ache.
Declan Fahy is going to regret the day he decided to come back into her life.
I dress in jeans and a black shirt, pull on my cut, and head out.The clubhouse is quiet this early.Most brothers still asleep or crashed wherever they ended up last night.
But Rush is in the common room, laptop open on the bar, papers spread around him.He looks up when I walk in.
"Thought you'd be by early," he says.
"You find something?"
"Yeah.Come look at this."
