Santino. My brain finally registers what’s going on. We’re in bed together—but not my bed. In his bed, in his room. We’re both naked, save for our underwear. Because we didn’t bother putting clothes on again after our late-night shower. And because I liked the feeling of his skin against mine, with nothing between us, nothing separating us.
But now it’s morning and I guess Rhys has just found us in bed together?
“Denny! Wake up!”
“Dude—chill. He had a late night, okay?”
“Yeah, I’m sure you both did.”
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“Okay, let’s all take a breath.” That’s Sebastian. What’s Sebastian doing here? “Why don’t you guys get dressed?”
“But Sebby?—”
“Come on, Rhys. Do you really want to talk to them while they’re lying naked in bed?”
Rhys lets out a frustrated sound, then stomps out toward the living room. “I can’t believe they’re inmybed.”
For some reason, that’s the thing that wakes me all the way up.Hisbed. Rhys’s bed. That he left here when he moved out.
I roll over and open my eyes blearily. Santino is sitting up, covers pooled in his lap. I can see the crease of his ass from this angle. The long, elegant curve of his back. The deep valley of his spine.
He turns and lies back down next to me, pulling the covers up to my chest.
“I thought we were supposed to get dressed,” I mumble, rubbing my eyes.
Santino gives me his lopsided smile. “They barged in here unannounced. They can wait a few minutes for us to wake up.”
I sigh. I’m awake. Unfortunately. I’d much rather be asleep and unconscious, all wrapped up in the safety of Santino’s arms. “What are they doing here?”
Santino’s shoulder rises and falls in a half-shrug. “I don’t know. But Rhys is definitely upset.”
Which is never a good sign. Especially not when you’re on the receiving end of his ire. I don’t know what he could be upset with me about though. We haven’t spoken in a couple days andhe’s not the type to sit on something if it’s bothering him. If I did something or said something that pissed him off, he would’ve told me already.
Sebastian, on the other hand… I groan and slap a hand over my face. Fuck. He’s been trying to talk to me for days now and I’ve been avoiding him at every turn. He probably called Rhys to see if he knew anything. Then they both decided to show up for a what—an intervention?
Santino’s gentle fingers wrap around my wrist and carefully tug my hand away from my face. “Hey, you don’t have to talk to them if you don’t want to. But…” He tilts his head and his brows draw together in concern. “It might not be a bad idea. They’re your friends. They care about you. They want to help.”
Panic and fear seize me. No, I can’t let them know. Not now after I’ve spent so many months lying to them. They’ll be hurt and upset. They won’t understand why I didn’t want to tell them. They’ll think it’s their fault. That they did something wrong. When it’s not their fault at all. It’s mine. Everything is my fault. I’m the one to blame.
The ache grows, gradual but steady, until it feels like an anvil sitting on my chest. I sit up, wincing as I force my lungs to expand.
This is it. This is when your friends find out just what kind of piece of shit human you are. They’re here to break up with you. They’re here to tell you never to contact them again.
No. Stop. Go away. I slam the heels of my hands against my temples as if that will make the voice shut up.
“Hayden?” Santino wraps himself around me and presses kisses to my shoulder. “What is it? Is it the voice?”
I nod as shame fills me. God, I can’t believe I told him about that yesterday. He must think I’m a fucking freak.
Yeah, he totally does.
“Whatever it’s saying, babe, you know it’s not true, right? You’re not a loser. You’re not worthless.”
What the hell does he know? He just met you. He hasn’t seen how depraved you are on the inside.
“Hey, babe.” Santino rearranges us so we’re facing each other, then pulls my hands away from my head so he can cup both of my cheeks. “Listen to me. You can’t fight this on your own. Youshouldn’t have tofight it on your own. Let us help you. Let your friends help you.”
