“Do you know when I planted these?”
“No, I can’t remember.”
“Neither can I,” he says, smiling. “But I know it was a long time ago. And sometimes they need to be trimmed. They need my care, my love.”
“Dad…”
“Everyone needs someone to take care of them.”
“You have your whole family.”
“What about you, Nick?” He turns to face me. “Who’s taking care of you?”
“I don’t need anyone to take care of me.”
He looks at me, condescendingly.
“I’m a big boy. And I’m fine, see? I don’t need anyone.”
“Oh, Nick.” Dad shakes his head. “You’ve always been so stubborn.”
“You know what I’m like.”
“Me? Of course I know. We all do. But doyoureally know who you are?”
I lower my gaze.
“Doessheknow?”
“She knows too well,” I say, fiddling with some of the leaves on the bush.
“Do you know the truth? You’re the only person who doesn’t know yourself. And now you’re going to run off, just like you always do. Wandering around without a purpose, taking your time… But in the end, you’ll always come back to where you started.”
“I’m not just ‘taking my time’. It’s work. You know that.”
“No one knows how important time is more than me. I wasted a lot of time in the past, too. Now I’d love to have that time back, but I can’t. But I can do one thing: I can live whatever I have left to the fullest. Because I know that, soon, I won’t be able to remember any of it.”
He places a hand on my shoulder and smiles.
“If you have to leave, then go. Don’t think about me, about us. But please, Nick: don’t forget to think about yourself. Don’t forget who you are, and never forget the way home.”
I take a deep breath. The pain is pressing down on me now.
“I’ll see you in a few weeks, okay?” I say, before turning and heading inside to say goodbye to my mum.
“You’ll come back, right?” she asks, worry weaving through her voice.
“Of course, Mum.”
“Have you said goodbye to your brothers?”
“Tell them I say bye, okay?”
“They’re not going to be happy.”
I smile sadly. “Then they’ll be right about one thing.”
I give my mum a quick kiss and leave the house, sliding into the car and heading back towards my apartment. I’m certain that this is the right decision; the decision that will cause the least damage to everyone.
