She had. Just not in an alley. “Yes.”
He spanked her again, but this time he didn’t stop. He counted. One and two and three and four. The pain flashed through her, and she realized that he knew she lied. Not technically since she had been in Lyon when Kala carefully shoved the knife into her and then sewed her up after a couple shots of vodka.
He got to thirty when he stopped and stepped back. “I watched Kara fight. More than that I had an interaction with her. She lied to me and sent me off on a wild-goose chase that only ended when I saw her following the target. It wasn’t you. I damn near gave myself up that day because I watched him stab you, but McKay showed up. It was the only reason I didn’t show myself.”
She wasn’t going to lie to him. Not again. “It’s in a place you cansee. I wear a lot of strapless gowns. It would be on all the dossiers foreign agencies keep on us. You know one of the records they keep is on an agent’s scars and tattoos. And before you get pissed at my parents you should know this was a protocol Kala and I put in. My father lost his shit every time we did it, and my mother threatened to quit. I called her bluff.”
She’d known her mom wouldn’t be able to sit on the sidelines. Though she had been more and more since Colton was born. Her mom wanted to be a happy grandma and spend time with her husband and their dogs and have some peace, but she followed her daughters around the world, constantly worried they would die playing this game.
“Every time she got wounded, you let them cut you up so you would have the same scars?”
Well, it hadn’t been all one sided. She’d done her own damage. “I made her do it. She didn’t want to, but we did it for the good of the mission, and don’t think she didn’t take a couple of my scars, too. I know you think it’s crazy, but we were building something epic.”
“And now you are fucking not because I can’t take this, Kenz,” he announced.
“She got a burn on her calf from the fire she was in when Huisman took her to Virginia. I tried to get a picture of it so I could replicate it and she promised to murder me if I ever did it again.” That was when she knew it was over. The career they dreamed of.
“That’s the first thing Kala and I have ever agreed on.” He took a long breath. “I understand that you were trying something new, but baby, you can’t do this to yourself anymore. It’s not just the scars, it’s everything. If you couldn’t have a fun night without worrying about your sister, this is not worth it. Have you ever played the way you need to?”
“I’ve played a lot, Ben.”
“But not the way you wanted to.” He leaned over, and she felt warmth on her shoulder. And then pain when he bit her. Again, it was controlled, and the thrill of sensation went through her. She fucking loved this. Her whole body was alive and awake and aware. “I’m not as experienced as I should be, but I swear we’ll work this out. For tonight, you tell me if I go too far.”
He bit his way down her body, little nips that wouldn’t even leave marks, but they lit up her skin. They made her gasp, hands curlingaround the bench. Normally she would be completely still, like this whole thing was a massage. Good for her body, so she accepted it all.
Now she realized she didn’t squirm because she didn’t get super aroused during a session. Not in years. Never like this.
Desire coiled through her, and she was ready to beg when he finally made it down to her ankles. He nipped her there and stepped between her spread legs.
She felt vulnerable, and she never did. She always knew she could take whatever Dom was servicing her, but this didn’t feel like some cold exchange. This wasn’t service. It was possession.
Her ass ached as he pressed her cheeks apart. “How familiar are you with anal, Kenzie?”
Fuck. “I’ve never had anal sex. Honestly, I’ve probably had less sex than you imagine. My father is serious about honey pots.”
A smack cracked through the air and then the delicious pain scorched through her. He did not hold back. She wasn’t some porcelain doll to him.
“Let it all go now, baby. Let go of the stress. Let go of the job. Your one goal right now is to let me take you somewhere only the two of us can go. You take everything I give you, including this plug because I’m going to take that sweet asshole of yours. And, baby, you should be grateful I only brought regular lube. If we’d had this conversation before, it would be ginger lube and you would feel the burn. It might be tomorrow. I might plug your ass before we go to the meeting, and I assure you I will do worse if you bring up your dad again while I’m staring at your asshole.”
He didn’t understand how open her parents were about sex. She’d discovered a person’s ability to talk about sex was a lot like how they handled blood. The sight for some sent them fainting dead away, but some people could eat a hearty meal while watching an operation.
Ben would need time to adjust since from what she could tell it wasn’t like his parents had him babysit his younger siblings so they could spend time at their sex club. And that was sad for him.
She wasn’t going into that tonight because he seemed serious about the whole lube situation, and it wasn’t like they were in a place where he couldn’t walk outside and ask for some exotic lube and not have twelve tops offer up some.
“Nothing to say? Excellent. You know I like this side of you, youglorious masochist. I like being the one who gives you what you need. And I think you need this.”
She gasped as she felt something hard against her asshole. His finger. He rimmed her and then she felt the lube. Somehow he’d warmed it, or she wouldn’t put it past Ollie to have a warmer of some kind in here since the fucker loved his luxuries.
She shivered as that finger dove deep, lubing her up and stretching her.
Never. She’d never let a Dom do this to her. There was something too intimate about it, but it felt right with him. Everything was right with him.
She gritted her teeth as she felt the hard edge of the plug. Still. She was always in motion, and here it was right and good to be still, to let him do what he wanted, to sink into a part of her soul that had always been hers. Now she found a person to share it with.
He worked the plug in, fucking her with it and lighting her up with sensation after sensation. Then he settled the plug deep inside.
“Damn, that’s pretty. I like discovering this with you. It makes me feel like this can work. Don’t lose the plug,” he commanded before he picked her up and started for the bed.
