"That was the end for us. I couldn't even look at him after that. I transferred schools just to get away."
Sighing, I met Nathan's gaze. His face was soft with shared sorrow and understanding. "Seems we've both lost a lot."
"We have." He reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. I shivered at his touch. "But maybe we found each other for a reason."
I wanted to believe that. Desperately. But the scars on my heart made it difficult to trust. To hope.
Clearing my throat, I stood, brushing off my jeans. "We should head back. Gavin willwonder where I am."
Nathan's jaw tightened at the mention of my brother. "Rissa, about Gavin. I think we need to tell him. About this thing between us."
Panic clutched at my throat. "No. Absolutely not. He'd lose it. We need to figure this out for ourselves first."
He frowned but finally nodded. "All right. We'll keep it quiet. For now."
I exhaled in relief, even as a pang of guilt twisted my stomach. Keeping secrets from my family felt wrong. But I couldn't risk Gavin's reaction. Not when I was still so uncertain myself.
Squaring my shoulders, I tilted my head toward the path. "Come on. Let's get out of here before they send a search party."
Nathan fell into step beside me, and we walked in heavy silence back toward his house, the ghost of our embrace still lingering on my skin.
"I'm so sorry you went through that with Henry," he said quietly, his voice laced with anger. "What an asshole. He should've been there for you."
Tears pricked at the back of my eyes. "Yeah, well, it showed me his true colors, at least."
Nathan stopped walking, turning to face me. "Rissa, I hope you know that you didn't deserve that. Any of it. Losing a child, I can't imagine the pain."
His earnestness broke the dam inside me. Tears leaked fast out of the corners of my eyes. "After it happened, after Henry, I just couldn't fathom going through that again. So I convinced my doctor to tie my tubes."
Nathan's eyes widened. "Permanently?"
I nodded. "Yep. I had to have our pack healer there to stop the shifter magic from undoing it as it healed. But it's done." I swallowed hard. "I'll never be able to carry a child again. It's too risky, even with my meds. I could never put another baby through that. Not knowing that the chances of it dying are high."
"Oh, Rissa..." Nathan pulled me into a tight hug as a sob shuddered through me. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart. So damn sorry."
We stood there for a long moment, his strong arms enveloping me as years of grief poured out. When I finally pulled back, his shirt was damp with my tears.
"Sorry," I mumbled, swiping at my cheeks.
"Don't apologize." His thumb brushed away an errant tear. "Thank you for trusting me with this."
I attempted a watery smile. "Thanks for listening. And not judging me for any of it."
"Never," he said firmly. With a sigh, he took my hand as we resumed walking across the expansive backyard. "Okay, I think we need a subject change before we both start bawling. Tell me something random about yourself. Something not depressing."
A surprised laugh escaped me. "Um, okay. Let me think." I bit my lip, casting about for something lighthearted. "Oh, I know. I'm a total coffee addict. Can't function without it."
Nathan made a face. "Ugh, really? I can't stand coffee."
I gasped in mock outrage. "What? How is that even possible?"
He chuckled. "Just never liked the taste. I'm more of a tea guy myself."
"Heathen," I teased, nudging him with my elbow. "Clearly, this relationshipis doomed."
The word hung in the air between us, heavy with implication. Relationship. Is that what this was now?
Desperate to dispel the sudden tension, I changed the subject yet again. "So, did you ever figure out why Elle hates me? I can't tell if she's mad at me for something specific or if that's just her general teenage vibe."
