“It was you. Chill, my dude.”
“Me?” His expression softens a little.
“Yeah. I felt the spark when we kissed properly for the first time, and by properly, I mean not the hesitant, stolen teenage kisses thing we did back then.”
His lips twitch in a smile, and I love that he always smiles around me, sometimes not meaning to, sometimes because he can’t help it.
Other times, like now, because he’s softening up to me.
“We were ridiculous,” he says, his fingers stroking my hair again, nearly lulling me to sleep.
“Mmm, most glamorous bi panic, though. Ten out of ten. Actually, six out of ten. Because we lost four years, see what I did there?”
“Maybe we needed those four years to get to where we are now. So there aren’t any what-ifs or veiled regrets.”
“Do you still have those? Regrets, I mean.”
“I don’t think I ever had them.”
“The last time I asked you to give me more, you called this temporary.”
He winces, his fingers pausing for a bit. “You’ll never let that go, will you?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.”
“I’m sorry, baby. I never thought of you as temporary, I promise.”
I narrow my eyes. “Are you only saying that because I’m injured?”
“No.”
“How would I know?”
“My parents found out.” He lets out an exhale. “Your dad sent them the picture of us kissing.”
Oh, shit. He’s also on the run?
“I’m sorry,” I murmur.
“Don’t be. It was the best opening for me to come out. I mean, not as a labeling thing or anything, but I told Mom and Dad the truth.”
“The truth?”
He smiles and it’s the widest I’ve ever seen. “Yes, they know the whole truth about how I’ve cared about you for four years and that no matter how much I tried to deny it, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to get over you.”
My heart squeezes so tight, the throb in my ribs pales in comparison.
He came out to his parents for me.
I’m almost scared to ask, but I whisper, “How did they take it? At least it doesn’t look like they beat you up, so that’s a good sign, right?”
“They were pretty supportive, Mom even reminded me that being with you doesn’t make me weak, and Dad said I don’t have to worry about leadership for decades, and as long as he’s alive, he’ll shoot anyone who dares to say anything about my sexual preferences.” He smiles with a sense of pride. “My cousin Lidya knows, too, and so do her parents, as well as my paternal aunt and her husband. The whole family back in New York is aware I went on a suicide mission to save you, and Aunt Karina called me a knight in shining armor. Lidya wants to meet you and personally test your fighting skills to see if you can protect me, but ignore her. Mom and Dad definitely want to get to know you better. They can come over here if you’re open to that, but no pressure.”
He sounds slightly winded, having blurted it out as if he’s been waiting to say it all this time.
“One more thing,” he continues, smiling, looking so liberated and happy, it’s contagious. “I’ll also be telling my friends, but I want to do that in person. Gareth already knows, but he’s known for a long time now. We’ve been kind of giving each other advice about the whole being-into-men thing, and it went from there. He’ll give you shit, just so you know, but I suppose that’s only fair with everything Cyrus has said to me…”
He stops talking, probably because I’m watching him closely. His smile drops as he runs a hand through his hair. “No pressure, though. I realize that sounded like too much.”
