I spent a lot of time convincing myself that she couldn't possibly mean what I wanted her to mean when she refused toleave… but this… I can't deny the meaning of this. And it wasn't even something she said to me. It was something she did quietly. Her own choices, in private, nothing grand or manipulative. As far as she's aware, I have no idea she's keeping my location a secret.
She did it to protect me. She's fighting for more time with me, stopping her family from reaching her while also making it clear to them that she's safe with me and staying by choice.
And the fact that she knows she's safe with me is another layer to this puzzle.
She trusts me.
What does she see in me that makes her stay?
Something good? Something real?
Whatever it is, she's decided it's worth fighting for.
Standing alone in my room with my back to the door, I am filled with a deep, aching yearning for her. I want to have hope. In fact, I can't stop the hope that seeps into my blood. But what about the betrayal? What about how she went behind my back to put me in danger, face-to-face with her family?
It takes me a while to pull myself together and go downstairs again. When I get to the kitchen, Nikita is there, making coffee for both of us.
"Hi," she smiles. "Did you sleep ok?"
"I did, and you?" I say cautiously, leaning against the kitchen counter with my arms folded over my chest.
"I feel a lot better today."
"That's good."
She turns to face me and hands me a cup of coffee. My eyes are instantly drawn to the chain around her neck. A little rabbit, and a silver sword.She's wearing it.
She shifts her weight from one foot to the other. "Bardil, I spoke to my brother this morning. I gave him my number and told him I'm staying," she says.
I cock my head to the side.
Honesty.
She's not keeping the call a secret.
"Ok," I reply, unsure what she wants me to say.
"I didn't tell them where you live, I promise," she adds quickly.
I nod. But then shake my head. Confusion and fear frustrate me. "Why?" I blurt out.
She smiles and reaches out to touch my face. I don't move away.
Her bright blue eyes lock with mine and she stares right into my soul.
Nikita says nothing, but her gaze speaks a thousand words. Words that explain her heart without a sound falling from her lips.
In that silence, I let my desire spread through me freely. Desire to make things work with her. Desire to find a way through the thorns and reach the roses.
When she drops her hand and asks, "Will you do something for me?"
I immediately answer, "Yes."
Nikita giggles. "Wait until I've told you what it is," she says.
"What is it?" I say, already knowing I will say yes again, no matter what she needs.
"Come to dinner with my family. One dinner. Please, give it a real chance."
