"So why are you sitting here looking at a bunch of pictures instead of talking to him?" Felix is an overprotective alphahole, so hearing him encourage me to talk to Jamie is throwing me for a loop.
Sass makes its way into my vocabulary. "Why are you sitting here telling me to talk to him? Aren't you supposed to have a shotgun out ready to kill any man who takes an interest in me?"
Felix snorts and shakes his head. "V, you told us a long time ago that we wouldn't be your dads. I may be married to your adoptive mom, but you've never given us permission to be anything more than cool uncles or overprotective family friends."
"Oh." Once again, I feel like a piece of shit. All I've done since I've met them is push everyone I love away. I'm just recently coming to terms with how much is wrong with me.
"And that's okay," Felix continues, patting my hand that still hovers over my keyboard. "We love you very much, kiddo. You’re family and the most important thing to your mama and us."
Tears fill my eyes, but I don't let them fall. All everyone has done for me is be patient and accepting of who I've become.
"And in all honesty..." Felix sighs and drops his head back to lean on the couch. "I'd rather you always be here and happy with Blue than out in the world finding your way. So it kills me to say this as someone who does think of you as my kid, but Jamie loves you. He's good for you. You're growing and learning shitall on your own, which terrifies me and the others, but it's so fucking normal for your age that I can't do much but give you a bit of wisdom when I can."
Chewing on the inside of my lip, I process his words. Felix is like the head of the family, so having his support and backing to be with Jamie is a relief in a way.
Taking a leap of faith, I ask a question I'd planned to avoid. "What about Nate and Ellis? What's your wisdom on that?"
Felix releases a big sigh that draws my attention. Shifting, I place my laptop down and turn toward him on the couch with my good foot tucked under me. Whatever he has to say will be heavy.
"Honestly, V, you remind me a lot of myself. If you weren't fifteen years my junior and not blood related, I'd think you were actually my kid." He pins me with a serious look, and for the first time, I actually feel like he could be a really amazing father. "You made some mistakes that were born out of fear. I did too. When I reconnected with Blue, I almost fucked it all up with my attitude. The four of us men didn't handle it well. It took a while for us to accept her feelings and anger."
"She was mad for a long time," I reflect quietly, remembering how much groveling they had to do to earn her trust.
Felix nods sadly. "Yes, and for good reason."
Ouch.
"We ghosted her for no good reason. Young and scared, we ran from our feelings. Sound familiar?"
"You're not pulling punches today," I grumble, feeling like a young child getting scolded for my immaturity.
He laughs again, helping me feel a little better. "You asked for my wisdom. First thing you need to do is acknowledge the fact that those men loved you so much that when you left, youbrokethem."
"I know that."
"No, sweetie. I mean, those men today are not the men you loved a long time ago. Blue was definitely not the same girl. She became a woman full of sass and independence while we were off with our thumbs up our asses."
Narrowing my eyes at Felix, I try to understand what he's saying. "I know they aren't the same. Clearly," I huff bitterly.
"Violet. Heartbreak changes people. So does love."
Tossing my hands up in the air, I ignore the twinge of pain in my ribs. "What the hell are you talking about now?"
"The men you knew seven years ago have changed. The men you met in January have changed. One was because you broke their hearts and the next...Well, can you believe they have fallen in love with you again? You heard what they said. They said it was real. The only way you'll come to the conclusion that feels right for you is if you give everyone a chance to explain."
"And if I decide they're a bunch of bastards who hurt me to get even, then what?"
Felix grins wickedly. "Then I'll be waiting for permission to use my shotgun."
A giggle slips free, and I don't even mind how much it hurts. It feels nice. Felix chuckles too and stands. "The hard part about loving multiple people is the different sides of the stories you need to consider. Love you," he says and kisses the top of my head as he leaves the room.
Every story has multiple sides. Mine has four.Am I strong enough to listen, though?
Eight
ELLIS
“Fuck, drive faster!" My heart is pounding out of my chest, and I feel like I'm about to lose my mind if I can't talk to one of them today.
