32
Reyes
After dropping Harrison off at school, I’d returned home to find the blanket fort empty. Jake must still be gone on his run. The blanket fort was fun, and I loved how it seemed to be bringing Jake and Harrison closer together, but I was desperate for a real mattress. I made our way to our room and collapsed onto our bed in hopes of catching a couple more hours of sleep. Instead of drifting to sleep, however, my mind began to work overtime.
These late nights with Harrison were not only exhausting me, but they were fucking with my head, plaguing me with doubts and uncertainties. I was starting to wonder if Jake would ever let me in. He’d gone above and beyond with Harrison, but it still felt like a line was drawn in the sand that he wasn’t ready to cross. I just didn’t understandwhy.Was it only because of Harrison? If I hadn’t pushed Harrison on him, would Jake have let me in before now? I knew this would be a hard adjustment, having a seven-year-old here, and I knew I was asking a lot of him, so maybe I had to accept that Jake wasn’t going to change his mind about a family. If that was the case, was I willing to let my desire for a family go just to keep Jake in my life?
If only Jake would talk to me.
The sound of the front door made me glance at the clock. Nearly two hours had passed since I’d dropped Harrison off. It wasn’t like Jake at all to be gone that long. I wondered if his prolonged run meant he was in an extra shitty mood or if he’d had a chance to get some of his early morning frustrations out.
I rolled to my back and yawned just as the door to our room opened. I expected Jake to just grab some clothes from the dresser before jumping into the shower as he had every other morning after a run, but he didn’t. Instead, he stared at me a few seconds before crawling onto the bed and lying on top of me. His skin was damp with sweat and cold to the touch after being out in the chilly morning air, making him shiver when I ran my hand up his arm. My traitorous body reacted to his nearness almost instantly, my cock swelling with need.
Without saying anything, he leaned in, kissing me with such tenderness that it stole my breath. All I could do was fold my arms around him and accept this moment, kissing him back with as much emotion as he was showing me. Slowly, he moved his lips to my jaw and then my neck, leaving a trail of kisses along the way. When he reached my ear, he whispered, “I love you, Reyes.”
More than a little stunned, I turned to face him, pushing him back just enough that I could see his eyes. They were soft and warm, his expression filled with a vulnerability I hadn’t seen before. The smile he was sporting threw me off too. It was the same sexy smile I’d seen the night I’d met him on the boat, the same one I’d seen nearly every time he looked at me, except now there were no walls separating us, no guard to keep his heart safely hidden from me. Jake was truly here. With me.
I furrowed my brows, trying to figure out what had brought this sudden change on, but there were no clues in his features.
“Okay, you should know I love hearing that, but… what the fuck happened to the grumpy Jake I kissed goodbye this morning? Did he fall into the ocean or something?”
Jake chuckled and propped himself up on his elbows. His smile faded as he ran a hand through my hair. “Do you remember me telling you about Grant?”
I nodded. “Of course.”
Jake had shared a few stories about Grant during one of our many late-night conversations. He said he’d only spoken to him a few times since he left New York, but the way Jake talked of him made it clear the man had made a terrific impact on him. The way he cared for his family through the years and especially his mom when his dad died, had meant everything to Jake. I knew that even though they weren’t very close anymore, Jake still had a huge amount of respect for him and considered him family.
Jake dropped his eyes. “Mom called to tell me he was killed in a car accident yesterday.”
I froze, caught off guard by the news. “Oh, babe. I’m so sorry,” I said, though it felt largely inadequate.
“It just made me realize how stupid I’ve been. I’ve been letting my fear hold me back from something great.” He lifted his eyes to meet mine again, and my heart started to thump hard enough in my chest I was sure Jake could feel it. “I don’t want to die without you knowing how much you mean to me, Rey.”
“I know,” I said, though I still couldn’t shake the lingering doubt in my mind.
“No, you don’t though, because I’ve been too selfish to say it. You’ve changed me, and you’ve made me want to be a better person. I love you so much it hurts sometimes, and in my own fucked-up head, I thought that if I let you see that… that if something happened to me, it would hurt youmoreknowing how I felt.”
I had no idea what to say to that, so I remained silent, gently stroking his back.
“But all I’ve been doing is hurting you anyway. Haven’t I?” he asked quietly.
I swallowed hard and gave him a very small nod.
Jake let out a breath. “Fuck, I’m sorry, Reyes. I love you so much, and I know when our balls are shriveled prunes, I’ll still want to lick them because you’re it for me, babe.”
I burst out laughing. “I’ll still want you then too.”
Jake’s eyes were light, his smile absolutely radiant. When he kissed me again, it sparked a fire in me that couldn’t be extinguished. We hadn’t had sex all week, and now the need to be close to him was almost suffocating. I slipped a hand under his shirt, searching for more contact, and in one quick move, Jake tossed it aside before climbing off the bed to kick the dogs out of the room. Quinn gave us sad eyes as he closed the door.
“We don’t need an audience,” he said, toeing out of his shoes and peeling his running leggings down. I tossed my pajamas on the floor just as quickly, never tearing my eyes from Jake’s. The sudden turn of events had me feeling lightheaded and dizzy, but I was so fucking happy. All I could do was reach for him and pull him against me, frantic to have him close. The moment our bodies collided, my entire world felt right again.Jake loved me!
Jake moved his hips against me. “Sorry I was such a dumbass,” he breathed, his lips finding mine again while he blindly reached inside the drawer of the bedside table for the lube and a condom. When he found them, he held the foil package up between two fingers with a questioning look. “I was tested before I transferred here, and I haven’t been with anyone but you since I’ve moved.”
I knew what he was getting at, and wished like hell I could say the same, but the truth was, I hadn’t been tested in probably six months. “I haven’t been with anyone either, but it’s been a while for me.”
Jake held no judgment in his eyes, only nodding in understanding. “Soon, then,” he said simply with a kiss. Not as a question, just a promise.
“Soon,” I agreed.
