“Johnny, make sure that all of the trash is taken out from upstairs and down here. What else do we have left to do?” he asks.
“I’ve got the bar cleaned up. Everything is done aside from washing the last ashtray that Johnny and Aaron have been using.” Linc points at the lone ashtray sitting on the bar filled with cigarette butts and ashes.
“Baby, I think that’s it other than trash,” I say, leaning my head on his arm.
He looks around and nods.
“Okay, then. Linc, you got this?” he asks, and I know he already knows the answer.
“Definitely got this.”
“Okay, boys. We’re out of here, then. I’ll see y’all Saturday for church,” he says, grabbing the cardboard box that houses our gifts and the last of some of the desserts that were left behind.
I hug Mindy and say goodbye to the guys on our way out. Cass packs the box to my car and kisses me first on my forehead, then my chin, then my nose, then finally on my lips. I’m grinning like a fool because he’s absolutely adorable and I don’t know how I got this lucky.
“Love you. Need you. Want you.”
“Ditto, baby,” I say, kissing his lips again. He smiles at me before turning to walk away.
“I’m right behind you,” I yell just before I close my car door.
I wait patiently while he puts on his gloves, face mask, and helmet. When I hear the engine come to life, I pull up behind him just as he takes off down the driveway. It’s freezing out tonight and there’s rain in the forecast for the early hours of the morning. How cheerful, a rainy Christmas Day.
I follow behind Cass the whole way home and I can tell that he’s cold. He rides slower when it’s cold. I don’t know if he realizes that’s a thing he does, but it’s cute. And also makes me feel just a smidge bad for him. He’ll be shivering half to death by the time we get inside the house.
The front of our house is lit with a string of white Christmas icicles hanging down from the eaves. We have a blow-up snowman that dances in the front yard along with a Santa, sleigh, and reindeer that look like they’re flying. It was Cass’s idea to decorate, and I cussed him the entire time that we were out there, freezing cold and hanging shit up and trying to figure out what went where.
I pull under the carport and grab our box of goodies out of the backseat. Inside, the house is warm and cozy and Cass comes in right behind me, shivering just like I thought he would be.
“It’s so fucking cold. I’m frozen,” he says, pulling his gloves off. I know what’s coming next. He’s about to put his ice cold hands under my shirt on my stomach to warm them up.
I take off toward the bedroom, running while I have a chance to get away.
“Come here, baby. I bet you’re so warm,” he says playfully, running behind me.
I plop on the bed and he lands right on top of me. I wiggle to break free but it’s no use. He got me. I’m laughing so hard I can hardly catch my breath, with him on top of me making it worse. His hands wiggle beneath me, until they get what they want and his ice cold finger tips are gripping my stomach.
“Ahhh!” I scream through my laughter.
“You’re so warm,” he whispers, relaxing and resting his head on top of mine.
I growl beneath him, jokingly.
Giggling like a schoolgirl, he rolls off of me and I take a deep breath. That solid fucker is heavy.
“Asshole.”
He shrugs his shoulders. “But I’m your asshole.”
I can’t even argue that. I look at him, smiling. I can’t think of anywhere else I’d rather be on Christmas Eve than laying right here with this man of mine. Regardless of anything and everything, above all else, this is where I want to be.
Although there are so many uncertainties, one thing is for sure: I love this man more than anything in the world.
I’ve watched him do unimaginable things, things I never thought I’d be able to watch happen right before my eyes, and never questioned him or his character. I thought I’d have nightmares of what I saw, and I did for a few weeks, but it was justified. Everything Cass has done has been justified.
“What are you thinking when you look at me like that?” he asks. It’s a question he’s asked before and I’m sure it’s a question he will ask again.
“How much I love you.”
