KALINA
Isank down to the floor. My knees hit the rough threads of the carpet with a jolting halt. Debris was embedded between the plies, but it wasn’t enough of a harsh abrasion to cut my skin or give me rug burn.
Cuts wouldn’t work.
Any blemish on my flesh would be a scar that Yusef and Erik couldn’t repair or hide. My brother had made it no secret that he needed to keep me in a perfect, pristine, and pure condition so he could sell me off.
Even though Yusef was a monster, he would do what Erik told him. Avoiding any permanent scars on my body was critical when they both counted on getting the highest price and making themselves that much wealthier after selling me.
“You are moving too slowly,” he snarled, as if I wanted an explanation for why he’d knocked me down.
I knew better than to speak up. And I definitely knew better than to talk back—ever.
I hung my head, practically bowing in submission to him as I knelt there. Getting up without his permission would be a worse sin yet. Breathing through the simmering frustration from his handling, I dipped my chin until it touched my chest. This was my life. My pathetic life of being so helpless to do anything but slip back into the depressing void. The blankness. The numbness that encompassed my soul any time I tried to rationalize why this was my fate.
I would never understand the cruelty my own brother could show me. I would never be able to comprehend why he would task his closest friend and business partner with tormenting me into submission like this.
Almost as if he were reading my mind, Yusef chuckled slowly. “This is all part of the training.”
I loathed that word.Training.Like I was a creature, not a woman.
“You must learn your place, stupid whore.”
I fumed at the insults, used to them but never forgiving.
“When you are given to your husband, he will expect you to be nimble on your feet, not clumsy.”
I doubted that clumsiness was actually the appropriate description for why I had tripped coming into this room. The pile of garbage rotting just inside the doorstep, a heap I couldn’t see while I was blindfolded, was the only reason I’d fallen. That and the fact that he’d pushed me to hurry inside the empty bedroom that reeked of old body odor. He’d prompted me to rush into this room so he could lock me in until Erik returned.
“When you are given to your husband, he will expect his wife to listen to his commands the instant he gives them, not move too slowly to react.”
A flicker of fury lit up inside me. It almost burned bright enough to sear though the numbness that blanketed me inside and out.
My husband can take his commands and fuck himself.
The temptation to yell that tickled my throat. That raw and honest opinion waited on my tongue, heavy and daring.
But I wasn’t stupid.
The last time I talked back and gave my opinion about anything was ten years ago. And I swore I could still feel the phantom agony of the broken bones I’d earned from the beating afterward.
“When you are given to your husband?—”
Without lifting my head, because eye contact was a form of disrespect and defiance according to Yusef and Erik, I let out a long breath. It seemed like I hadn’t had a chance to fill my lungs fully with this last transportation. Being forced to walk through the cold wintry streets of New York without a coat was cruel. Only the warmth of the blindfold over my eyes once we entered the building helped. Still, since coming into this barely heated apartment, I felt so chilled to my bones. Short, shallow breaths were all I could manage when every icy inhale of air felt like a freeze spreading from my chest.
Yusef didn’t continue.
Time stood still.
He remained where he was, in front of me without speaking or moving. Like always, the burn of his stare felt like a lethal threat.
What?
What is it now?
Anxiety kicked in as I tried to understand why he’d cut himself off so suddenly. Erik had a slightly less volatile temper than Yusef, but both of them were unpredictably ruthless.
Without moving, staying as still as possible, I waited for him to carry on and blather about what would be expected of me.
