The ride to the rehab center took forever, but Seth refused to tell me what had happened to Amani. He just repeated what he’d said earlier…that Phoenix needed me. Fear took hold of me as I wondered if the unthinkable had happened.
I was dimly aware of Seth following me into the building, but I didn’t wait for him to keep up, though it wasn’t really an issue since I was carrying Henry’s car seat. I rushed to Amani’s room and didn’t even pause before flying through the door.
Phoenix was sitting by the little girl’s bed, his back to me.
“Phoenix,” I whispered.
He turned to look at me and I saw that he was crying. “No,” I breathed. I put Henry’s car seat down and walked right into his arms. His hug was brutally tight as he sobbed against my neck.
“It’s okay,” I said softly as I ran my fingers through his short hair.
“She’s awake, Levi,” he managed to get out.
I froze at his words. When he pulled back, he was smiling and he wiped at his tears. “She’s awake,” he said again and then he was tugging me towards the bed. My eyes settled on the little girl who was looking at me, but this time her eyes were actuallyonme.
“Peaches, I want you to meet someone,” Phoenix said. “Again,” he added with a laugh as he took my hand in his. A mix of confusion and joy went through me as understanding dawned and I jerked my gaze to where Seth was standing in the doorway. He smiled broadly at me and I finally realized I’d been had.
And I didn’t care in the least. I smiled back and mouthed the wordsthank youto him. He nodded and then pointed to Henry’s car seat and I nodded. I watched him take Henry out of the room, so I could put all my focus where it needed to be.
On Phoenix and his daughter.
Epilogue
Phoenix
Three monthslater
“I can’t do this.”
“Yes, you can,” I insisted as I came up behind Levi and put my arms around him. He was studying his appearance in front of the floor length mirror that was attached to the inside of the closet door. He’d dressed more formally than he needed to for family dinner, but I wasn’t about to argue with him about it. He was already on edge about the night as it was.
He shook his head. “He says he’s okay, but he can’t be,” he insisted. “Looking at me must be a constant reminder of that night.”
I sighed because he and I had been having this argument for weeks. Every time Seth had reached out to invite us to family dinner, in fact. Levi had declined each time until Seth had finally showed up at our doorstep earlier in the week, Jamie and Nicole in tow, and invited himself to a playdate with Henry and Amani to force the issue with Levi.
“You’re also a constant reminder that he still has his daughterbecause of you,” I said as I turned him around to face me and loosened the top couple buttons of his button-down shirt.
“Those people will know I don’t belong there,” he said.
I hated that Levi’s self-esteem continued to be an issue for him, but I knew it wouldn’t be something he got over in a matter of days or weeks or even months. I’d finally convinced him to start seeing a therapist to discuss some of the trauma he’d faced as a child, but it was a double-edged sword because, while he was supposed to be honest with his therapist, there was one thing he could never tell her, since she’d be required to report it.
And it was the one thing that still haunted him.
The attack on Seth and his parents.
In the days after T’s abduction of Henry, I’d mourned the loss of Levi. Him telling me he didn’t trust me had hurt more than if he’d told me he didn’t love me. The pain had been enough to have me curling in on myself. I’d managed to find enough strength to put things into motion after Seth had come to me to tell me about his plans to help Levi get custody of Henry, but three days after I’d said my goodbyes to Levi, I’d gotten the call I’d been waiting to get for more than a year.
Amani is awake.
Even now, the doctor’s words caused my whole body to shudder in excitement. I’d forgotten everything else as I’d raced to the rehab center. When I’d run into Amani’s room, she’d turned her head from where she’d been looking out the window and she’d smiled at me.
Just smiled.
Because she hadn’t been able to talk then. The doctors had reassured me that she’d likely regain her speech, but that she would need time and lots of therapy. Her motor skills were compromised too. I’d held my daughter’s hand as the doctors had explained it would take months, if not years, for Amani to learn to do things like talk, walk and eat again. But I hadn’t cared because as I’d sat there, she’d held my hand. Not briefly as part of a reflexive movement. But really held it.
I’d been a mess for days after that.
Crying almost constantly every time Amani woke up from a nap and looked at me. I’d been terrified that she’d close her eyes and when she’d open them again, she’d be back in the vegetative state, so every time she’d looked at me andseenme, it had been like I was reliving that first moment all over again.
