Maybe if I took the step of enrolling Cheyenne into the school in Chris’s district, I wouldn’t feel like such a failure.
For now, I’d make the drive back to Woodland Park, hang out with the girls, cry myself to sleep for the umpteenth time, then drive to work the next day. I wasn’t sure how my extra week off had flown by so fast. I’d looked into the leave act Dr. Cook had mentioned, but going unpaid for three months wasn’t something I found helpful. What would help was screwing bones back together and inserting a new knee or hip. Solving my patients’ problems would take my mind off my own.
As I drove down the interstate, my cell rang. I glanced at the NAV screen to read the caller ID. I didn’t recognize the number, but the area code was Lexington. The auto accept connected the call.
“Hello?”
“Dr. Kennedy, it’s Linda Simmons.”
“Yes, how can I help you?”
“A court date has been set for you to be deemed a permanent guardian for Cheyenne and Ashlynn. They are willing to allow you to be present via video chat. Are you able to do so?”
“Yes. Thank you so much for the accommodation.” I still wasn’t sure if I could go back to Ellynn’s house, knowing she wasn’t there, and pack everything off for good.
Chris had informed me Piper and Tuck were willing to oversee an estate sale if need be. Everyone was so ... accommodating. I didn’t know how to handle that. Sometimes, I wanted to curl up in a ball and forget that this was my reality. I wanted my baby sister back. I wanted my goofy brother-in-law, who made my sister laugh more than I’d ever seen growing up with her. I wanted my beautiful nieces to have their loving parents. How could I be a substitute? I was married to my work and had only just now found a friend.
“Then I’ll mark you down as video chat and confirm your date.”
“Thank you, Ms. Simmons.”
“If you don’t mind me saying, I’m praying for you and the girls. God will see you through.”
My breath hitched. Why did this feel like the brightest neon sign flashing in a desert showing me exactly where water was? I wasn’t sure why that image popped in my head, but it resonated deep within.
“Thank you,” I whispered before disconnecting.
I wasn’t sure how many times I’d say those words, butthey might turn bitter in my mouth if I didn’t remember that I’d gone from being completely alone to having someone I could talk to. I had someone who would comfort me if I needed it. Chris had become one of my dearest friends in this whole ordeal. He’d understand how I felt about being named permanent guardian. Plus I could talk to Charlie. He comforted me at night when no one else could.
At times I still felt like Dr. Erykah Kennedy, but having people when I used to be alone made me feel like a new species. I’d never been completely comfortable in solitude, despite how awkward I was around others. Even though being excluded and looking from the outside on every part of life had drained me, I was used to that song and dance. Social anxiety had been my companion long before Charlie whimpered in the bushes.
Even now I found myself seeking solitude from the constant attention of my nieces, a dog, and a YouTuber. In fact, Chris even asked me to be in an upcoming video. He’d already planned out his online video content for next month, wanting holiday-inspired shorts he could upload once Thanksgiving was over.
Somehow I’d gained a family when Ellynn had lost hers.
“Why?” I whispered. It made no sense. Why did this have to happen?
The silence in my car continued. There was no answer, and I had a sinking feeling I’d never get one.
I turned on my music, desperately trying to drown out the thoughts in my mind as I traveled the rest of the way home. By the time I parked behind Chris’s gas guzzler—talk about irony—I was ready to be done with the day. But I still needed to cook dinner, hang out with the girls, and pretend like seeing Chris do domestic chores didn’t give me tachycardia.
When I walked through the front door, chaos greeted me.
Cheyenne lay on the floor, arms and feet swinging as she screamed at the top of her lungs. Ash’s wails were intermixed in the cacophony as Chris looked helplessly between the two.
I sniffed. Something was burning.
I placed my purse on the hook, hung up my jacket, then immediately took Ashlynn from Chris’s arms. She tucked her head underneath my neck, hiccups shaking her little body.
“Something’s burning. Did you attempt dinner?” I asked with a smile.
Chris muttered under his breath and raced into the kitchen.
Knowing he had that alarm taken care of and Ash had now quieted, I knelt beside my other niece.
“We don’t do that,” I stated firmly.
Cheye halted her kicks and screams and stared at me. “Do what?” She sniffed as salt tracks marred her cheeks.
