When I get back, he’s sitting on the floor next to the tub. It can’t be very comfortable for him, given how tall he is, but it doesn’t seem to bother him. He listens to everything she says and laughs when she’s silly.
After, we go to her room and put the guardrails on the bed down and pull back the covers while she grabs a book off of her shelf.
“Oh shoot, I forgot her milk. I’ll be right back.”
“Okay,” he says as I walk out.
Then I hear, “Daddy, you lay wif me?”
And I have to silence my gasp with my hand.
I wait for him to answer, and after a pause, he says gruffly, “Yeah, I can lie with you.”
My heart.
I grab the milk, then quickly return. And the sight that meets me is just … everything. Liam’s big body is sprawled across her full-size mattress, and Sera is in the middle of the bed with her head tucked into his shoulder.
She looks up at me when she notices me come in and pats the mattress on her other side. “Mommy lay too.”
I press my hand to my mouth, then walk over, hand her the milk, and climb in.
Liam looks at me over her head, and I can see the emotion swimming in his eyes.
He reads her a story, and then she begs for another. And by the time he finishes, her eyes are heavy.
I kiss her on the head. “Night, my favorite girl in the world. I love you so so much.”
“Night, Mommy. Wuv you.” She yawns.
Liam kisses her on the head next.
“Night, Daddy. Wuv you,” she whispers sleepily.
“Night, sweetheart. I love you too.” He barely manages to say it back, voice thick.
My heart leaps and then falls down to my chest. As much as I love having Liam in our lives, I’m realizing my heart will break if our newfound family falls apart. Because I like this too much. No … I think I love this.
I love us.
And it scares me.
The house is quiet as we finish cleaning up the kitchen. Once he finishes wiping down the stove, he folds the towel and sets it aside.
I turn to face him and lean against the sink.
“That went better than I’d expected,” I whisper.
He laughs softly. “Yeah, I guess I’m not really sure what to expect because my experience with almost two-year-olds is limited, but she handled it like I was telling her that the sky was blue.”
We start to move closer to each other without really thinking about it.
“What does this look like, Alie?” he asks quietly.
“I’m not really sure. I think what we’ve been doing. Spend time together. Be consistent. Be present,” I suggest.
“I can do that for her. I’ll do whatever it takes.”
“Good,” I say, swallowing the lump in my throat.
