I didn’t want to complicate things.
It seemed like a sign that I should move to New York.
I know that what happened between you and Alyssa took place around the time that I had been pulling away from you. Not that it would have had anything to do with me at all. But what I’m saying is—I’m not mad about it. I have no right to be.
Anyway, I waited for them to leave the ladies’ room before emerging from the bathroom stall. I figured she was going to call or text you soon to let you know she was there. So I decided to leave.
Do you understand?
It wasn’t my place to tell you why I had changed my mind.
But I do want you to know that my mind was changed.
By which I mean—my mind and body did want to go up and see you in that hotel room.
I know that I made the right decision.
I am sure you’re relieved that things played out this way too.
She sounded really nice. Alyssa. It sounds like your family and hers are close. I hope that it makes you feel more like you fit in with your own family.
I can tell that you feel like you don’t fit in.
I know that people, myself included, see you as an entitled old-money trust-fund guy.
But here’s the thing that people don’t see, the thing that maybe you don’t see about yourself, and I see it now: You want to earn your success in life. That’s the opposite of entitlement. Yeah, maybe some of your drive comes from wanting your dad to tell you he’s proud of you, but you are a rebel. You knew that the family business wasn’t right for you and that it was right for your brother, so you walked away from it. That was brave. Badass, even. If a guy who has ever worn loafers even once can be called a badass.
You’re still a grumpy-ass mofo. You’re still a big dummy for hating all of the things you hate. But I see all the other things you are. I see you. Or I saw you anyway. Even if I never see you in person or talk to you again. Even if you never read this email, I believe in energy. I believe that you will feel this sentiment somehow. And I hope it brings you peace.
And I will also tell you this: You’re a damn good kisser, Elijah Abrams. A damn good kisser.
I hope you have a wonderful life.
And I hope you finally learn to like the movieIt’s a Wonderful Lifeor at least realize what an ass you are for not liking it.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Life,
Curly
FROM:[email protected]
Dec. 19, 2022, 9:27 PM
SUBJECT:Happy Holidays
I just wanted to say that I heard about your divorce and I’m sorry.
My friend Franklin is the interior designer you hired to work on your new house. I know him from Paso Robles, and I used to talk to him about you (by “talk” I mean complain) when we were in film school together. He said you got a really great house in Brentwood (he went on and on about the hardwood floors and the morning light in the kitchen and how hot you look in sweatpants), and he said that he has never met a dad who cared so much about his son’s room.
He said it sounded like it was a friendly divorce but that you seem really sad. Grumpy and sad. Grumpy and hot and sad (his words, not mine).
I just wanted to say that I’m sorry.
I haven’t been back to LA since I moved to New York, and I actually just moved into an amazing apartment in Greenwich Village with my boyfriend. You’d like him. Actually, you probably wouldn’t like him, but you would like his Blu-ray collection.
I was thinking about you and I realized it’s December 19, so I figured I should write this email to you even though it’s not really your email address.
