We sit in silence as we plate our food, family potluck style. I watch as Liam fills his plate to the brim, chunks of food falling off. I’m curious if his body rejects the food he consumes due to the size of his pencil arms shoveling it in his mouth.
How does a guy his size eat that much and not look a little more . . . well . . .healthy?
“So Eleanor, how’s the new client population? Are they opening up to you? Sharing their real-life problems?”
It might just be the preconceived notion I have about this guy but I sense a condescending tone in his questions. What does he have against my students?
“It’s going well, actually. I’m really enjoying it,” she says, smiling at me.
“Are you helping them find prom dresses and deal with breakups yet?” He chuckles, again mouth so full of food some of it falls out.
“Actually, I do more than that—”
“There’s no way you’re feeling fulfilled,” he interrupts, “and actually making any lasting impact on the world of mental health. You know, the other day I diagnosed a set of adult twins with Borderline Personality Disorder.” He continues talking in-between bites of food, “They’ve lived for almost forty years unaware of their symptoms, believing they were just born that way. It was invigorating to finally solve the puzzle. Just imagine the thrill you could get if you were still at the clinic!” He points his fork covered in chicken casserole at Ellie.
“That does sound thrilling,” Ellie responds in a whisper. I’ll give the girl credit, she’s trying to be respectful of the guest, regardless of him being a tool. “But what I’m doing now is also thrilling in its own way.” She pokes at her food as Liam laughs in response.
“No way. High school drama is just that,drama. There’s no true clinical or diagnostic side of helping someone apply for college.” He laughs so hard his face is beet red. “You thinkthat’sthrilling? Please!” The man is about to collapse from his laughter.
“It is thrilling!” Emma snaps at him.
Attempting to slow his laughing, he nods. “Right, sure.”
“It really is. Just the other day I helped a student overcome a panic attack! And last week, I helped another mend a relationship with his parents,” Ellie says confidently, sitting up straighter. Her smile says “screw you”but below the table, her leg is shaking uncontrollably. Unsure if she’s shaking out of anger towards Liam being a jerk, or the truth that her job isn’t as thrilling as it used to be, I place my hand on her thigh like before, “I’m here.”
“You’re not living up to your potential.” He stares at her.
I swallow the lump in my throat . . . herpotential.
“Yes she is!” Emma places her hand on Ellie’s hand. “Don’t listen to him. What you’re doing is valuable and impactful.” She stares at Liam with a hot anger I’ve never seen from her before.
“I’m just saying”—he waves his hands up—“your growth here is limited. All you will ever be is a school counselor.” He shrugs matter of factly and my heart breaks . . . he’s right. The longer she is at Glendale, the less appealing she becomes as a psychologist and the more she falls under theguidance counselorumbrella. And last I checked, that’s not what she wants. Ellie has goals and aspirations so big that Glendale could be hindering her from reaching them.
Icould be hindering her.
“What’s so wrong with that? Being a school counselor is admirable!” Emma shouts at Liam and stands from the table. Steven tries grabbing her hand, but she dodges it and storms to the kitchen.
“No offense, Em!” Liam says, not turning around to look at her. “It’s just the truth. With her education and experience, Eleanor could have endless opportunities.” He looks at Steven for backup but Steven ignores him and leaves the table. Emma begins aggressively cleaning the kitchen and putting food away as Liam continues. Again, very unaware of social cues tostop.
“If you stay at the clinic you’ll get more opportunities for advancement. Associates will be seeking you out and you won’t be stuck at—”
“I’m not stuck!” Ellie cuts Liam off, slamming her hands on the table.
“You know what I mean, Ellie,” he says, crossing his arms on the table, he gives her a look that makes my stomach drop. A look with feelings—feelings with a history.
“I actually don’t know what you mean.”
“If you stay at Glendale, you won’t be taken seriously. Your judgment won’t be valued in our field.”Ourfield . . . the word crushes my heart. Another reminder of everything they have in common and what theywere. The truth is crushing as I sit here helpless. I don’t have anything to offer intheirfield. I can’t help her change the world the way Liam can. I can’t help make her dreams come true.
“Yes, it will! And it does not make me any less qualified or desirable!” Her voice was rising with each word and all I wanted to do was throw this guy through a window for upsetting her like this.
“Sure, of course not.” He nods in an obvious, sarcastic way, like he pities her. My legs tense up as the image of drop-kicking him in the chest flashes through my mind. “Just be honest with yourself. You’re selling yourself short and you’ll never amount to anything by staying at Glendale.”
Before I have the chance to reach across the table and wring Liam’s neck, Ellie jumps up with her fists clenched at her sides, sending her chair toppling over behind her. “You have no idea what you’re talking about!” She stands in place, looking ready to kick his teeth in and I feel a twinge of gratitude at how defensive she is of our school. “Glendale has a lot to offer and I feel lucky to be a part of it! And it will help meamountto whatever the hell I want!”
Liam, seeming to be unphased by her sudden burst from the table, sits back in his chair and sips on his wine. I’m concerned at his minimal reaction to Ellie’s anger—that is directed solely at him—but he probably deals with worse on a daily basis so this could be nothing to him. For me, I have to fight back my urge to scoop her up and carry her out of here—remind her over and over that he’s wrong and she can and will do anything she sets her mind to, and I will be there with her as she does it, cheering her on every step of the way. I want her to know she has everything to offer. That she iseverything.
“Whatever you say.” Liam finishes the last of his wine. “I just don’t see any indication that you’re going anywhere.”
