"You owe me answers, Shadow," I say with unyielding command. "What is a Nexus?"
He moves closer, and the room seems to contract around him. "The Nexus…" He trails off. For a minute, I think he isn’t going to answer.
"The Nexus is the key between our realms. Protecting it was my duty, but I forsook that duty when I broke the covenant."
"The covenant?"
"The sacred rules of my world. I broke them."
…for you.
He doesn’t say the words but I hear them all the same. His voice is laden with an intimate guilt that slices through me. I bear the weight of responsibility on my shoulders. I know why he was imprisoned. Because of me.
He shakes his head. "The border between our worlds was under my protection until I was sent away," he continues, a growl of anger tingeing his words. "A new detail was assigned in my absence. The ones who took over… They're incompetent." He snorts, like an angry bull. "The Guard is more concerned with capturing me than keeping the Nexus safe."
From what I can tell, the Guard is a collective.
"They are still hunting you?" I ask. "That’s why you can’t always come to me?" It’s a small hope. One I’m dumb enough to have after everything.
The hope that he wants to be with me as much as I want to be with him. It’s a pearl that balloons inside me until there is barely room in my chest for my heart to beat.
Shadow’s posture softens. "Yes." The word is full of tortured regret.
Hewantsto be with me.
If it weren’t for the Guard hunting him, he would be with me.
I grab my bicep, trying to steady myself, but each second tilts my world farther on its axis. "So if the monsters are looking for this key, why are they coming for me?"
Shadow stares at me so unerringly long, my skin begins to itch under his scrutiny. "I've put you in danger by spending too much time with you. I’ve drawn their attention in the last place I meant to…"
I snort as I grip my other bicep. "And now monsters are popping out and trying to eat me."
"It wasn’t going to eat you," Shadow says quietly. Tentacles snap in agitation. "It was going to swallow you whole, store you in its belly and take you somewhere it could get answers out of you. Torture you even… to get the key."
"Jesus." I scrub a hand over my face. That freaks me out way worse than if it just wanted to eat me. Being trapped alive in its body is an incredibly disturbing thing to imagine. A sickening churn kicks up in my stomach again. "That’s what the redeye maw terror wanted with me too, isn’t it?"
Shadow stills.
I’m right.
"And they are going to keep coming for me, aren’t they?" That comes out a whisper. I’m afraid to say it out loud. "What is the key?"
I instantly regret the question. What if one of these monsters got a hold of me? Tortured me. Maybe it’s best I don’t know.
Shadow’s gaze burns into mine, and there's a sorrow there that cuts deeper than any knife. "It's not a what, Evie. It's a who. And they think it's you."
Make It Hurt
The world tilts on its axis again, and I'm left reeling. "Me? A key? But I don't know anything about these worlds." I try to grab hold of reality, but it slips away like sand through my fingers. This can't be happening.
I’m not special. Not by any means.
The thought of being a key, something important, is laughable. It's absurd to think that my wretched existence could hold any weight or significance. In fact, even entertaining the idea causes me almost physical pain.
"They don’t know that. They see me spending time with you, and believe you are the key."
I lick my lips.
