“Shut up shut up shut up,” he hisses as I whisper-yelp,“The fuck are you doing?” and Thalia’s behind us, shoving Bastien and muttering, “Go, go, okay, turn left?—”
“That’s the bathroom!”
“I know it’s the bathroom, just go!”
“Get off me!”
I’m unceremoniously shoved into the downstairs bathroom, and before I can turn around, there’s the click of a lock and both my siblings are standing in front of the door like they’re guarding it.
I wish I’d been an only child. Madeline seems well-adjusted, and no one is dragging her into bathrooms by her neck.
“What the hell?” I ask, because we’ve gotta start somewhere.
“This is an intervention,” Thalia says. “You obviously have a thing for Madeline, and we’re going to help.”
“No, I don’t, and no, you’re not,” I say, folding my arms over my chest. I wish it were just Bastien in front of the door, because I don’t mind wrestling him. I’d feel bad doing that to my sister, though.
“You justsaidthat the problem was Mom finding out?—”
“That was an example of a possible problem.”
“No, that was you finally admitting?—”
“I’m not admitting anything!”
Bastien rubs his hands over his face. “Look, okay, I’m sorry for teasing you,” he says, which I wasn’t expecting. I relax a little. “But I can’t keep waiting for you two to start making out on the couch, and it’s starting to get awkward for us.”
“Wow, sorry,” I say.
“Thank you.”
I take a deep breath. Maybe I can reason my way out of this bathroom? Does that work with siblings? “Look. I’m not into her as anything other than a completely platonic friend and stepsibling, and shedefinitelyisn’t into me as anything but that, so can you please let it go?”
“Wait,” says Thalia, and now she’s frowning. “Did Madeline say something to you?”
“I’ll have words. I don’t care if she’s family,” Bastien adds.
I look from one to the other, both in front of the bathroom door, theirI’ll fight anyonefaces in full swing because I insinuated that someone doesn’t like me back. Shit. They’ve figured it out, right? I’ve probably lied to them enough for a lifetime, right?
“Okay, okay, fine,” I say. “We hooked up a couple of times, but I called it off after— Why do youlooklike that?”
“You slept together!?”
“A couple of times?”
Shit. SHIT. The bathroom goes dead silent. The only sound is Mom and Gerald chatting in the kitchen. Is this what hell feels like? Am I dead right now?
“What did you drag me in here for?” I hiss-whisper.
“To talk about your huge, obvious crush on our stepsister!” Bastien hiss-whispers back.
“I was gonna tell you to ask her out!” Thalia adds. “To coffee! Or dinner! Or drinks! But you’ve already—” She waves her hands in a gesture that I guess meanshad sexual relations, and I cover my face in my hands. Jesus Christ, I want to rewind this conversation by about thirty seconds.
“Look,” I say as calmly as I possibly can, though I might be shaking with adrenaline and I’m positive I’m bright red. “It’s not some perverted taboo incest thing. We met a few years ago.”
“Met,” Thalia says.
“And bymetyou mean?—”
