I snorted. Of course, he’d be taking charge. I didn’t want to leave. I wanted answers. “Oh, now you care about whether I’m okay,” I muttered as I unlocked my door.Okay, chill, girl, where did that come from?Well, we knew where that came from. I could fake like everything was fine between us when his brother was there, but with just the two of us, the memories and hurt wouldn’t disappear.
Harris paused before entering the cottage, a pained look on his face. “Cammy-”
I walked further in, my anger rising at the memory of the time we spoke all those years ago, dulling out the ache of my banged-up arm. “I think the first aid kit’s in the bathroom. I’ll be back. Please close the door before flies get in.”
When I came back from the bathroom, Harris was standing in the open kitchen talking on his phone and looking around like he was inspecting the place for what I didn’t know.
“I’m getting you guards and another place to stay. This isn’t going to work.” He walked toward me and took the kit from my hands. “Let me do this.”
He tilted his head to the dining table, adjacent to the kitchen. I dutifully followed. As I always did. As everyone did. “Still bossy, I see.”
I hated to take orders but also, I had no idea what was going on. I could be angry, but I couldn’t be stupid. I wanted a peaceful vacation to clear my head, not dodging magical attacks and I knew better than to think this was a coincidence. Someone could have been following him, but they waited until I appeared to do anything.
He shrugged, face unnervingly neutral. He was in business mode. “Sit.”
Once again, I followed directions. Why was I doing that? Well, I did hurt my arm. There were other hills to die on.
He moved a chair in front of me, and I watched silently as he went through the kit and pulled out the things he needed. “Now that I have you captive, you’ll let me apologize,” he stated more as a demand than a question as he poured benzol peroxide on a cotton ball.
That was so him to say it that way. “Apologize for what?”
He glanced up at me quickly with a doubtful look before focusing back on what he was doing. “For how harsh I was when we spoke all those years ago.”
I huffed. “And ending our almost twenty-year friendship out of the blue.”
He lifted my arm, and I bared my elbow to him. He then leaned forward and breathed over my wound as he dabbed at it with the damp cotton ball. I still felt a bit of the sting, but not as much had he not breathed on my skin. It was surprisingly nurturing of him and mildly seductive. For the second time that day, my stomach twisted with something close to desire for him.
He looked at me with hooded eyes. “Does it hurt?”
I shook my head as he put a large band-aid on the wound and then leaned back as if admiring his work. I eyed him expectantly. Was that it? I was twenty-seven the last time we talked, and now I was at the ripe old age of forty-two, and he just casually said sorry for tossing our friendship in the trash for no reason. I kept my mouth shut as I waited for him to say more words to better his so far sorry apology.
He squinted his eyes, a slight smirk on his lips. I hated him. At least I actually wanted to hate him because why did he have the pure audacity to look so damn good? He always had. And there went my stupid heart, beating so rapidly I thought he could hear it. How did I still have a crush on him after all this time? I’d beenmarried and had a few boyfriends, but the boy I had my first crush on at ten was still it for me.
I’d kept it to myself, like a soldier, and things had been much easier after he yelled at me back then. However, he was so sweet the other day and, although he’d crashed into me just now, the way he’d taken care of me was swoon-worthy. But I had to be strong. I couldn’t let him off the hook. Despite his smile and hypnotic eyes. What was he trying to do here? We’d never flirted before. Well, not strongly. Wait, was he flirting with me? Was I reading too much into this?
I adjusted in my seat and decided it was best to respond to his smile with a glower. He was not going to get off this easy. He leaned forward, our knees close to touching. I scooted my chair back, but he reached out, gripping the sides of my seat and dragging my chair closer to him until our knees actually did touch. I yelped in shock, the heat from his body almost flowing into mine. What was happening? Why was this so hot? His hands were still there, touching the outer part of my bare thighs. I was getting overheated. Was I going to pass out? I felt like I was going to pass out. I had freaking heart palpitations.
Be cool, Cammy. Don’t pass out. He can’t ever know he has this kind of effect on you. You are an adult. Be better than this.
“Camilla Robinson,” he began. “There’s no apology good enough that I can give you for destroying the precious friendship that we had. The best I can do is give you a why. And not the why I gave you then. It was dumb and, to be real, a lie. You are one of the most important people to me in my life, and all I ever wanted to do was protect you from the fucked-up world that I lived in.”
I shook my head, confused. “I grew up with you. I knew your world.”
He sighed, shutting his eyes and then opening them again. He looked pained. What was happening with him? “Cammy, you knew the world as something my parents and the eldersin our families did. The face they showed you wasn’t the truth. And you didn’t know my part. I kept that from you. And, for the most part, it wasn’t as damning until I got out of business school. Marcus took the brunt of the ugly side of our operation before then. But when I was done with my education, my father expected me to take a leadership role in his world. And it was a dark world. That’s a world you never saw. It’s a world I never wanted you to see. It would have changed you. It changed my brothers. My mother stayed medicated. Marcus lost his childhood. I never had one, except during my time with you, and Sammy turned to drugs. We weren’t okay. I didn’t want you to see that.”
I inhaled, and his woodsy yet sweet scent filled my nostrils, momentarily distracting me from the seriousness of his words. I needed to talk to him from afar. “I didn’t know that. I would have understood. Why were you so mean then?”
He nodded slowly. “I had to be so you would be shielded from it all. I had to make you hate me so I wouldn’t be tempted to keep you…around. I relied on you a lot for my happiness. More than I should have. You tutored me. You came to my soccer games. Helped me dodge the women who weren’t so good for me. You were my world. More than you knew. It wasn’t fair to you, what I could have done to you if I kept you near.”
He lightly tapped the side of my thigh, and just that minimal contact fluttered my core. Really, he could barely do anything to me, and it seemed my body would fall apart for him. This is what happens when you are basically celibate and then meet the man who ignites your whole sexual soul.
“Cammy,” he commanded. Could he tell my mind was drifting? “I also might have pushed you away because I hated your ex.”
I twisted my lips. “I knew that. You told me so. In fact, if I can recall correctly, it was the day I told you we were getting engaged that you called me weak.”
His face scrunched, and he had the decency to look remorseful. “Yeah, I didn’t call you weak because you were with him. I wanted better for you. He was a self-absorbed asshole. Instead of calling you weak, I wanted to say you were too good for my world. I’m sure your parents felt the same, they just didn’t say anything.”
Of course, my parents wouldn’t. They were reaping too many benefits and access from the wealthier world that Harris’ family gave them. My dad knew where they buried the bodies, literally. Often in other realms. However, he never said anything about my connection with Harris. Never dissuaded him from coming over to play. Never seeming to worry when I went out to the movies, or the mall, or anything with him. In fact, he seemed less worried. I chalked it up to the fact that a bodyguard was always around, so he knew I’d be safe. It was only when we got older, college age, that my parents seemed to tense whenever Harris came around. I couldn’t figure out why at the time. However, now I knew, and Harris had just confirmed it, that he was getting more emersed in the criminal life as he got older. A life everyone shielded me from.
