I frowned. “She got angry?”
Neil’s face flushed as his eyes narrowed on his coffee. “I thought I’d gotten her there, but apparently, she was faking it. Told me I was the worst lay she’d ever had. It was—” He cleared his throat, setting down his mug. “She was really mean about it.”
“Oh. I’m sorry.” The words came out dully. I was pretty sure that was the fourth woman besides me he’d slept with. And she was the only one who had complained? Suddenly, I no longer wanted to know the details.
“It hurt to hear that. I mean, I haven’t made you come either, but you always accepted your half of that. She was acting like Iwas pathetic for not getting her there.” He shrugged, fiddling with the plate that held his toast.
I remained quiet, finishing my own coffee.
“Have you?” Neil asked.
My hands tightened around my empty mug. “Have I what?”
“Have you orgasmed with any of the men you’ve been with?”
A rushing filled my ears as I stared at the light-brown residue in my cup.
“Oh shit.” His tone softened. “You still haven’t?”
I couldn’t let him think that. “I haven’t had sex with anyone else.”
“What?” The word snapped out of him. He straightened. “You really hate sex so much you haven’t hooked up at all?”
“I don’t hate sex!” I shouted, glaring at him. “Stop saying that.”
“Well, you sure as hell don’t want to do it with me. It’s been months!”
I let the mug snap down on the counter. “Ask your last hookup why.” I moved past him toward the bedroom.
“Really, Hailey? You think that’s okay to throw at me?” His voice broke, and I froze.
I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. Then I turned to face him. “No. I’m sorry. I just don’t like you throwing my inability to orgasm in my face.”
“You’re right. I’m sorry, too.” Neil took a breath, his wobbling chin firming. “I’m not okay with what you said, though. You really haven’t done anything with anyone?”
I shook my head. “It just hasn’t worked out. I didn’t like Victor, and then after what the second guy did, I’ve been a little nervous.”
Neil’s eyebrows drew together. “What did the second guy do? You mean the guy I picked out for you at the bar?”
“Oh, no, he wasn’t interested. I met someone on the app the week after, and he—” My throat grew tight as my heart thudded in my ears. I’d thought that incident would haunt me, but it was more like I’d pushed it from my mind. Now it snuck up on me all over again. “His kiss was aggressive. I didn’t like being pushed like that.”
“That makes sense. You wouldn’t like someone who went too fast.” Neil was nodding. “Sounds like he made you uncomfortable.”
“Yeah,” I said, for once not trying to explain it away as just a kiss. “It made me more cautious, that’s all. Last night was going well, though.”
“And then I showed up.” Neil winced.
“It’s okay. I’m not sure I would have left with him anyway.” I still couldn’t quite picture myself going off somewhere with a stranger.
“You need to sleep with someone else, Hailey. Otherwise, I’m a cheating dirtbag.” He sighed. “You can’t do that to me. We agreed, this was going to be both of us.”
My arms wrapped around my torso. “I’m trying. I’ll keep trying.”
“What if I helped again?” he offered.
I eyed him. He was smiling, nearly bouncing on his feet. Was he that eager to help me sleep with someone who wasn’t him? “I don’t know,” I hedged, feeling on edge. He hadn’t helped at all the two times he’d been with me.
“Let me help. I had an idea I wanted to run by you anyway.” He waved his hand toward the couch. “Let’s sit.”
