“That’s the last thing I want.”
Declan barks out a laugh. “If I recall, this is what you wanted in the beginning. And now you’ve got it.”
“Fuck that,” I growl, landing another body shot.
I’m about to lose my fucking mind.
I come at Declan full force. “I was wrong then, and I’m going to fix it now.”
“If it makes you feel better, she seems just as miserable as you. I talked to her yesterday when I stopped by your penthouse. She looks like a ghost of herself.”
That makes me feel worse. And better. Fuck, this is all a mess.
“You’re making this too complicated, Ash. You need to givein to what you want and just go for it. You’re both miserable without each other.”
“And the threats over Greenspan? You saw the text.”
I can still see the text in my head.
Unknown: An offer to purchase Greenspan will be delivered to your board next week and it would be in your best interest to accept it. Akio Kobayashi will never walk again, and it would be a shame if you or your pretty little girlfriend came to share that same fate.
Akio isour top researcher for Greenspan, a renewable energy company we own. He was injured in an accident on the job that we now know wasn’t an accident. Greenspan is being targeted with sabotage to cripple it because it’s a major threat to the oil industry. Declan, Sterling, our brother based in London, and I are working to take down the threats from TDC Oil, the company we believe to be behind the sabotage and some of the people responsible for my grandfather’s death, but until we take out this threat, Ella is a target, and she’s in danger.
And therein lies my problem.
I have to keep her close to keep her safe, but the more I bring her into my life, the more I put her in danger. I want her, and wanting her puts her in danger, so I’m fucked no matter what I do. All I know is I can’t lose her the way I lost my grandpa. I won’t survive it if I do.
So, I have to be careful about our relationship since our situation is complicated. The problem is, Ella doesn’t know that. Not the whole story of it, at least. I’ve only shared bits and pieces of my past with her because I only just realized that the people who killed my grandfather twenty-five years ago are thesame people threating me now. I will tell her, but I don’t want to yet. First, because there are still some unknowns I need to puzzle together, and second, because she’s just been through hell with her ex. Her fucking ex who pulled a gun on her to extort money from me. The fallout of that situation is a mess—with the media, with the board, and the last thing I want is to burden her with another problem. She needs time to recover first, and I’m determined to give it to her.
Declan dances out of my reach, then stars spark across my vision as he sneaks in a jab that hits me square on the jaw. Shit, that hurt.
“You know as well as I do that the safest place for her is with you. And if you push her away, you’ll lose your shares.”
I growl and throw a sloppy punch, missing Declan’s face by inches. That’s the crux of the situation. I was forced into this relationship by my board to improve my image, and now I’ve unintentionally put Ella in danger. Our relationship may have started as a farce, but it’s nothing close to one anymore, and the longer she’s with me, the more I fall for her. And the more I know it will gut me if I’m forced let her go.
“As someone who’s sworn off relationships, you sure seem keen to push me into one.” I don’t know why I spit the words at Declan with venom in my voice. This isn’t his doing, and I know he’s just trying to help, but I can’t stop the irrational anger from gushing out of me.
“I’m not pushing you into a relationship for the hell of it. I see the way you look at her. I see the way you two are with one another. She’s not just a fling, and you know it.”
“You seem a little too invested.”
“I’m invested because I care about you, dumbass. I see what a fool you’re being, and I’m trying to knock some sense into your head.” He does just that, hitting me with another jab that makes my eyes water and my ears ring. “Once upon a time, all I ever wanted was to find love and have a happy little family.That hasn’t worked out for me, and I’ve accepted that. But you’ve found the jackpot and you’re throwing it away. Don’t be an idiot, Asher. You have what none of us ever thought we would, so quit being a bitch, and go for it before you lose her. Because I’ll tell you one thing, the minute the world knows she’s single and fair game, she’ll be hunted like a damn prize. You may have put her on the map, but she’s stayed there because she’s special—and you’re not the only rich and powerful motherfucker to notice it. Every man looks at you with envy when you’re with her, and the minute you’re out of the picture, men will come swarming like vultures, and you’ll lose her forever. Do you really want to live with that?”
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
I haven’t thought about that in a while. I’ve been so caught up in the complications of our situation that I stopped thinking about what the future would look like if I did lose her. This whole situation with Ella was supposed to be an arrangement, and I always knew I’d be letting her go at some point, but somewhere along the way that became unacceptable. And now the thought of her with someone else makes me see red.
“Are you going to be okay watching her move on with her future without you?” Declan continues, hitting me with a quick combination. “Think about how you’re going to feel when she moves out—for good. What about when she moves in with another man? What about when she gets engaged, married, has kids with someone else? If you choose not to keep her, someone else will get their happily ever after with her, and you’ll regret it for the rest of your life.”
Declan’s words are like another punch, but instead of wounding me, they incite me. I lay into him, feeding my rage into my arms and hands. I hit him back with my own brutal combination, and he staggers backward into the ropes. Whenhe gets his feet back under him, he shakes his head to clear it, then smirks at me.
“You know you want to fix this.”
“I know. And I will, but I need to get this threat taken care of first.” I take a few long breaths, trying to calm my racing heart. “Tyrone has some more information for me. I need to hear what he has to say, and then I’ll figure out what to do from there.”
“And if it’s bad news?”
