He kissed my stomach again, then again, and the tenderness in the way he touched me made my eyes close.
After a minute he slid back up my body and pulled me against his chest.
I rested my head there while his fingers moved slowly through my hair, and he kissed the top of my head like he always did when he was tryna calm me down.
Kay’Lo held me like that for a long time while my breathin’ finally slowed and my mind stopped racin’.
Eventually the warmth of his body and the rhythm of his chest risin’ under my cheek pulled me into sleep, and the last thing I remember was his fingers still movin’ through my hair while he kept me wrapped up in his arms.
A few days had passed and I decided to do some retail therapy with Sha’Nelle.
My nerves had been so fuckin’ fried that I couldn’t even sit still in my own damn house no more, and being pregnant just made everything heavier ‘cause m I felt every emotion twice. Ever since that interview dropped, it felt like the whole world had flipped overnight. My phone had been buzzin’ nonstop with messages and tags and strangers feelin’ bold enough to speak on me and my husband like they knew him personally, and even though I tried to ignore that shit ‘cause I knew how stupid people could be, it still found its way into my spirit at night when the house got quiet.
The mall was crowded like always with people movin’ in packs with shoppin’ bags swingin’ off they wrists, music spillin’out of storefronts, kids runnin’ around while parents tried to keep up, and for a minute it felt normal. Sha’Nelle linked her arm through mine and pulled me into the first designer store she saw like she was on a mission to fix my mood with money.
“Today we spendin’,” she said, already eyein’ the display cases. “You not finna sit up in the damn house stressin’ no more.”
We walked inside the store and the smell of leather and perfume hit me at the same time. The sales associate smiled like she recognized me but wasn’t sure from where, and Sha’Nelle wasted no time pullin’ bags down and throwin’ them over my shoulder like she was dressin’ me herself. She hyped up every single one and told me I deserved it, and before I knew it I was standin’ in front of a mirror with a brown designer bag that felt soft as hell in my hands.
“Kay’Lo gon’ be talkin’ shit,” I said, lookin’ at the price.
Sha’Nelle snorted. “That nigga would buy this whole store if you blink twice. Stop playin’, bitch.”
I smiled ‘cause she wasn’t wrong.
We left with a few purses and hit a jewelry store next where I ended up buyin’ two bracelets and a necklace that caught my eye, and for a lil’ while I felt lighter than I had in days. It wasn’t about the money, but about feelin’ normal again. But that shit ain’t last long.
We had just stepped out of another store when I heard it. “Excuse me… are you Toni Mensah?”
The tone told me everything before I even turned around.
I faced her and saw the phone up first. The camera was already recordin’. She had a fake ass concerned look on her face like she was doin’ journalism instead of harassin’ a pregnant woman in a mall.
“Who the fuck askin’?” I asked flat.
She stepped closer, bold as hell, and raised the phone higher so it was right in my face.
“I just wanna know how it feels to be married to a rapist,” she said loud enough that people nearby slowed down. “And you’re pregnant by him too, right? Don’t you think that’s disgusting?”
My stomach flipped and for a second I couldn’t even process how comfortable she was sayin’ that shit to me in public.
Sha’Nelle stepped in front of me immediately. “Bitch, if you don’t move that fuckin’ phone,” she snapped. “I’mma show you somethin’ hoe!”
“I’m just askin’ a question,” the bitch said, like she was innocent.
“You better take yo’ ass on somewhere before I drag you through this mall, bitch!” Sha’Nelle yelled, pointin’ her finger at the stupid ass woman’s face.
People was already pullin’ out they own phones, hungry for a scene. Security had started walkin’ over, and the woman finally lowered her camera when she realized she wasn’t about to get the reaction she wanted.
Sha’Nelle grabbed my hand and pulled me away before I could even say somethin’ else, and by the time we reached the parkin’ lot my whole body felt like it was hummin’ with anger.
“That raggedy bitch,” I muttered as I got into the passenger seat.
Sha’Nelle started the car. “Muthafuckas is crazy, for real.”
I stared out the window while we pulled out, but my chest felt tight and my stomach was doin’ flips that had nothin’ to do with my baby. This wasn’t internet comments no more. This was real life.
About ten minutes into the drive, I noticed a gray car in the rearview mirror. At first, I ignored it, but when we made two turns and it made the same two turns, my heart started beatin’ faster.
