It barely matters. On some level, I know he’ll be back. Whether he’s punishing me, or simply taking a break, he won’t leave for good. He needs this island as much as I do.
He’s as much a part of it as I am. And not that I wouldeveradmit this to anyone… but it’s as muchhisas it is mine.
Slouching back in my seat, I drink and stare, thinking about how, eventually, they all fly away. Such is the curse of an evil king.
I must sit, forever chained to this throne. While the rest spread their wings, I remain. Shackled and alone.Como un pájaro… en el alambre de púas.
I’m the bird, wrapped in barbed wire.
Stuck… infinitelycapturedby this empire. In a crown of thorns…
Heavy hangs the fucking head.
Fluttering…
Wavering in place, I’m suspended in time. I feel like I’mfloating…
I think I even mewl.God, I hope I didn’t.
That would make him think I’m enjoying this…Which I am not.
Surely I’m falling apart for a different reason. Not from his lips on mine.
Sucking tenderly… Scrambling my goddamn brain.
It’s over too quick, and when he pulls back, I fear he may have taken my mask with him. For a split second, I’m exposed, and it’s utterly horrifying.
Scrambling to get it back into place, I swallow and frown, watching him suck his bottom lip, savoring it for only a moment before he leans in and whispers, “I feel absolutelynothingfor you.”
Just like that, I’m ignited in aragestronger than a million blazing suns.
Jonathan came back to me, but with the caveat that he apparently feels likehe’sin charge. Only moments ago, he stormed in here, accusing me of having his mother killed.
Sure, I expected him to do that. But before I could evenexplain, he sort of attacked me…
And he fucking kissed me.
It was so unexpected, I froze. Like when you grab a cat by the scruff of its neck.
I went solid; mortified, and bewildered, and… inconvenientlywarm.
It makes no sense. I know I’ve always been affected by him, and I can’t explain it, nor can I seem to expel it by demolishing him like a hurricane to his weathered old structure.
As it turns out, his concrete is quite sturdy. And he’s nowhere near asuncertainas I’d hoped.
Still, I didn’t think any of this actually meant I wanted, you know…that.
I didn’t even feel likeme. For the roughly ten seconds that his lips were on mine, I wasn’t The Ivory anymore. I might not have even been Manuel Blanco…
I’m honestly not surewhoI was, but he seemed like justsome guy. A normal person, and a nervous one, at that. One who’s just as broken as the man kissing him. Maybe more…
Maybe a lot more.
I…hatedit.
But I didn’t want it to stop.
As soon as it did, I was The Ivory again.AndThe Ivoryis going to chew people’s goddamn throats out to make sure henevergets played like that again.
