“I’ll call you in the morning. Mindy Sue said Brooke needs to turn in a term paper and take her last final exam. I’ll see if she’s up to it. No matter what, I’m staying until I can bring her home.”
Susanne knew him well enough to know he wouldn’t leave Brooke alone anytime soon.
“I wish I was there, but I don’t think I’d have been able to keep myself together. She needs us to be strong for her. I can’t imagine her grief. The thought of losing her…I can’t go there. She’s my heart, Cody. And so are you. I hurt for the both of you.”
Cody could barely get his next words past the lump in his throat. “You need to prepare yourself to see her. She’s hurt badly. It’s going to take her weeks to heal.” He took a minute to calm himself before he went on. “Susanne, I’m sorry. This is my fault. If I’d talked to her after we… If I didn’t let this thing with Kristi roll on, even when I knew…”
“You shouldn’t have crossed the line if you only intended to hurt her,” she snapped.
“I didn’t want to hurt her. Kristi was pregnant. What else could I do, but be there for her and the baby?”
Susanne cried harder. “I’m s-sorry. I know y-you’d n-never hurt her intentionally. I’m just so an-angry about her st-staying away, and not confiding in me. I feel so helpless to h-help her now.”
“It’s going to be okay. This is my fault and I’ll fix it.”
Susanne let out a heavy sigh. “Cody, don’t do that to yourself. Blaming yourself won’t help her. Even if Brooke had told you about the baby, she probably still would have returned to school to finish her semester. The person stalking her would have found her here, there, wherever she went. It isn’t your fault.”
He appreciated that she said that, even if he didn’t believe it.
“Sometimes, terrible things happen. We can only do our best for her now. She needs us, our love and support.”
“I know. And I promise I will give her all of that and more.”
“I know you will. Call me in the morning. Kiss her goodnight for me.”
“I will.” He ended the call, walked back into the room, locked the door again, crossed to her bed, and leaned over Brooke, kissing her softly on the forehead. “Your mom told me to tell you she loves you, sweetheart.” Because she was asleep, he added, “I love you, too,” and pressed his lips to her forehead, hoping that when she woke up, she’d be happy to see him.
Stretched out on Mindy Sue’s bed, he lay on his side, just looking at her sleep beside him. In the more than ten years he’d known her, he’d never told her he loved her even in a non-romantic way. She’d told him all the time how she felt. She made a point of showing him how much she cared. Maybe not always in the best way—she could be a little forward at times—but she’d been young and determined.
He had to admit, even when her antics to win him were comical, he was flattered.
It hit him hard that he’d almost lost her, and he’d never told her how he felt about her. Maybe he hadn’t known how deep his feelings ran. Maybe he’d denied them for so long, he couldn’t see them for what they were.
Everything had come clear that night they shared together, five days ago, and now. He didn’t want to waste another day of his life without her. He needed to be loved by her. He wanted to spend every day, every hour, every second loving her. Because he did. Deeply. Wholeheartedly. And he was ready to make sure she knew and felt it every day for the rest of their lives.
If she’d let him.
Chapter Eight
Beyond tired. Everything hurt. Every big and little cut and bruise and broken bone. Her muscles still ached from the fight. Nothing felt normal. Brooke wanted to wake up from this nightmare. But she was already awake and still drowning in misery and heartache.
She opened her eyes and stared across at Cody, lying on his back on Mindy Sue’s bed, his forearm over his eyes, the other arm draped across his flat belly.
Sometime in the middle of the night, she’d woken to the pain radiating through her whole body. His deep, gentle voice whispered in her ear that she was safe. She’d be okay. Then he gave her the blessed pills that sent her back into oblivion.
She remembered feeling his lips pressed to her forehead and how it paused everything else and gave her a moment of joy before it crashed into pain once again.
He didn’t belong to her.
He’d leave and go back to Kristi and his life withher.
She had nothing left of her old life. Not even her baby.
And if Cody was here, that meant he knew what had happened. What she’d failed to do. She didn’t have to tell him.
All she had to do was face the kindness he’d show her, because he was a good guy. She didn’t deserve his kindness. She’d failed. And they’d lost the precious soul she didn’t protect.
She clenched her hand over the tiny vessel that held her daughter’s ashes and turned away from Cody. It hurt to look at him, to know that the piece of him he’d given her was gone.
