They looked at each other with uncertainty, but I held my ground. Stealing a glance at me, the older of the two said, “Yes, mistress. Right away. Will Lord Tarrin be requiring another mount in Luca’s stead, mistress?”
“The king said he’d send updated orders on their requirements later,” I lied, trying to maintain the false sense of authority I’d tenuously created.
Within minutes, the massive, keen-eyed, speckled reddish-brown beauty was led by the younger groom, clopping toward me. Luca chuffed as if he were expecting someone else to be standing there. Thank the Mother he couldn’t talk, or he would have surely exposed me for the fraud I was. Maybe it had been reckless to ask for Luca, but he was the only horse I’d ridden here and trusted.
I looked Luca over. I’d need him prepped for a longer journey than they’d assumed.
“Please add his largest riding sack,” I said, giving no explanation or leaving room for negotiation. If there was anything I’d learned from this damn place, it was that you could get away with a lot more by offering less—the thought left a bitter aftertaste in my mouth.
They did as ordered, then gave me a hand up onto the massive horse.
I paused, feeling Luca’s bulk underneath, and an unexpected sadness filled me, knowing I’d neverreturn, at least not on my own volition. Stars, this place could have held great happiness for me. It’s funny how things can change in an instant.
Pulling my jacket tight against the crisp morning that felt like autumn, I steadied myself, then turned the reins north.
Luca was a gem of a horse, and our connection was instant and deep. Knowing whose horse he was, I wondered if Tarrin’s protective fondness for me had somehow seeped into the majestic creature that carried me swiftly across the lands.
Bathed in the luminescence of the moons, I gave Luca his head when the trail permitted. He seemed to delight in the freedom, and in those wild, wind-filled, flying moments, I did too. Riding hard felt like the ground itself moved at our behest, as if the destination itself was pulled toward us, and despite his size, Luca’s grace was unparalleled.
As we picked our way through the thicket, the safer choice would have been to dismount, but Luca’s height made my small frame vulnerable. Instead, I ducked down and hugged his massive neck, trusting him to navigate the bramble. And while I wasn’t certain, I could’ve sworn he swelled with pride every time.
At the comfortable pace Thaddeus and I maintained when traveling to the lake, it would take about eight hours to arrive at the cabin. I’d hoped to cut that in half but had to be mindful of Luca. Luckily, he’d rested yesterday and was keeping pace, only dipping his head for water as we crossed the meandering creeks that littered these lands.
Luca reminded me of Tarrin—offering support without complaint or inquiry. And as his hooves sloshed through a creek, the anger and hurt I harbored for Tarrin softened. Taking stock of the vision’s revelations, what happened wasn’t on him—or Nevander, for that matter. This was on Thaddeus, and Thaddeus alone.
Whether I was numb from shock or had simply reached my threshold, I couldn't tell. But toward Thaddeus, there was nothing but a hollow emptiness, like a sieve too worn to retain anything at all.
Perhaps the bar I was forced to bend to was lowered one too many times, finally snapping me in two.
Rounding the familiar corner a few hours after dawn, my breath hitched, and I pulled up hard on Luca, stopping us dead in our tracks. He reared slightly and whinnied at the abrupt command.
I loosened the reins, heeling him gently forward.
A wayward tear slipped from its confines as we approached the rubble and ash where there’d once been a tiny two-bedroom cabin. Staring at the undiscernible mound, I wondered if the dilapidated building had gone ablaze on its own, or if this too was Thaddeus’ handiwork.
The symbolism wasn’t lost on me as I stared at the remnants of where I’d grown up. My life had just been set aflame, and I questioned if I’d be able to salvage any part of it, or if it would be reduced to rubble and ashes, forgotten and abandoned like the heap before me.
Oh gods. Mrs. E!
A primal bolt of terror crashed through me, and in an instant, we were galloping toward her estate, away from the dank wetness of charred wood.
I’d never spoken of Mrs. E while I was at the palace, but they’d known about my family well before I’d met them. What if they knew about her and how dear she was to me? And with what happened to my parents…
I kicked harder, urging Luca to run like the wind.
My heart pounded in my chest, and with each powerful push of Luca’s legs beneath me, my mind raced with images that illustrated my greatest fears of what I would find.
Luca and I arrived at the back of Mrs. E’s estate, which appeared to be untouched. That tiny fragment of relief was quickly chased away as the panic doubled back when I didn’t see her.
The soft, verdant ground churned under Luca’s powerful hooves as we approached the front of the house. An undignified sound escaped me from the overwhelming reassurance I felt as I caught sight of Mrs. E, hunched over tending her garden—something I’d witnessed a thousand times before.
She twisted toward the barreling horse, her eyes wide with fear. They widened further as she met my gaze. Luca slowed, but I didn’t wait for him to stop as I carelessly dismounted and made for her at an all-out sprint. One moment, I was sliding off Luca, and the next, Mrs. E’s tiny frame was in my arms, fresh earth and a hint of flowers tickling my senses.
I wept uncontrollably in her arms, and she in mine, as we held each other tight, both incapable of letting go.
She pulled away first, her hands wiping my tears as she looked up at me. The love and concern in her eyes spurred another fit of sobs, and she wrapped me in her arms.
When I’d settled, she released me, tracing each one of my features with her eyes as if incapable of believing I was truly there.
