“Can I ask you another question?” I asked then.
“Shoot.”
“Do you ever miss me?”
Walker didn’t blink. “All the time.”
“Do you ever wish things had gone differently for us?”
“All the time.”
“If I asked you to kiss me right now, would you?”
Walker put his book down. “Nope.”
“Why not?”
“Because we got like three hours of sleep last night. And you had to scatter your father’s ashes today. And ride in a gondola. And relive the worst thing I ever did to you.”
“You think I’m not in my right mind.”
“I think it’s been a very long day.”
“You’re worried about me.”
Walker nodded. “Frequently.”
“But what about you? Are you worried aboutyou?”
Walker held my gaze and shook his head.
“Last night, after you fell and landed on top of me ... did you think about kissing me?”
Slowly, Walker nodded.
“Why didn’t you?”
“Because I don’t deserve you.”
“What if I forgive you?”
“I don’t want you to forgive me.”
“What if I did it anyway?”
“That’s not what I came here for.”
“What did you come here for?”
“To apologize. And I guess just—to see you. I missed seeing your face.”
“Does any part of you still like me? You know—romantically?”
“I will like you romantically until the day I die.”
I felt those words like fireworks inside my body. “But you don’t want to kiss me?”
“I want to. I’m just not going to.”
