“Going to Branson with Stacy’s family. Working. You know. The usual.”
“Cool.” Ramin had been so relieved to see Noah, but now he just felt annoyed. Jealous. Noah had a girlfriend, and Ramin was still single, headed off to college as a virgin.
Whatever.
Thankfully their teacher didn’t actually try to make them learn anything. They all sat around joking and talking and sharing stories until the last bell rang. Ramin and Noah and the other seniors cheered and headed toward the student parking lot.
“Well,” Noah said. “We did it.”
“We did it,” Ramin agreed.
He looked at Noah. Noah looked back at him.
He didn’t know what to say.
He wanted to ask for Noah’s number. Promise to keep in touch. But they’d never been that kind of friends.
Noah seemed to think so, too. Because he looked past Ramin and waved, smiling, as Stacy skipped over and wrapped him in a hug.
Ramin felt cold all over. “See you,” he called, and Noah waved goodbye, and then that was it.
Ramin didn’t dwell on it, though.
Arya and Farzan were waiting for him.
Now
Ramin stood on the platform long after Noah’s train had steamed away. He stared at the dark tunnel.
“I better go.” That’s all Noah had said.
And what did Ramin expect, really? Noah to ignore Jake being in the hospital? Ramin wouldn’t like Noah nearly so well if he was the kind of man who could do that.
Wait for him? Well, maybe. Ramin understood panic. He didn’t really blame Noah for that, either.
That didn’t stop the ache in his chest, though. The sourness in his stomach. The burning in his throat.
Yesterday had been everything Ramin ever dreamed of. Not the sex (well, not just the sex, because fuck had that been good, every single time), but just being with Noah.
That’s all Ramin really wanted. To be with Noah.
Shit. He had it bad, didn’t he? There was no getting away from this. Maybe there never had been.
The truth had been bubbling in him for twenty years, building pressure until, like a bottle of Prosecco, fate had popped the cork and all Ramin’s feelings had come exploding out.
Eleven days. Half a lifetime.
A single look.
That’s all it had ever truly taken for Ramin, wasn’t it? One look and he was a goner.
Granted, at the time he’d been walled into the closet “Cask of Amontillado” style.For the love of God, Montresor!
But Noah had gone anyway. Ramin wasn’t enough for him to stay. No, that was wrong; it was Noah’sson, what kind of monster would Ramin have to be to want Noah to stay?
He didn’t want Noah to stay. He just wanted Noah to sayCome with me.
To share the burden. That’s all he wanted.
