“You’re talking about friendship, princess. You know that, right?”
This path was dangerous, and James was more observant than I wanted to believe. I was referring to Will, and he understood that.
“It’s much better for a relationship to start out as friendship and then develop into love than a relationship just based on physical stuff,” I said, then remembered that the friends-to-lovers trope wasn’t my favorite genre either.
“So it’s better for us to fool ourselves? Is that what you’re saying?” James looked at me, confused.
“No, I didn’t say that. If someone likes you, you’re together, full stop. You’ll see whether it’s love or not, right?”
“Ah!” He started laughing, coughing out the smoke still trapped in his lungs.
“Now I get it, White. Listen, I wasn’t talking about you.”
I suddenly froze.
“Most human relationships are like this,” he added. “We all want something missing in us, and we look for it in others. What leads you to have a relationship? Did you ever ask yourself that?”
He stopped briefly to smoke after that question. I saw him repeatedly fidget with the joint.
“Humans are social creatures, it’s normal that it would be that way,” I retorted, shrugging.
“It’s often just a give and take.”
“So are you telling me that love and friendship are nothing but a transaction, James?”
I watched him with a raised eyebrow, almost shocked by his cynicism.
“In theory it shouldn’t be that way, but in practice it is.”
“But love should be an unconditional feeling.”
“You just answered your own question. It should be but isn’t. Never. Not even our parents are capable of it, let alone strangers.”
His words didn’t have even a hint of hesitation.
“You think people use you, don’t you?”
“It’s mutual. I’m not complaining. Could you prove me wrong, White?”
“I can’t speak for the others, but take me for instance. What do I get?”
“You know that having me here makes you feel safe.”
Busted.
“Meaning?”
I watched him take the last few hits with a hard look and clenched jaw.
“Meaning if that asshole Austin tries to come near you again, I’ll kill him.”
I was speechless for a few seconds.
“But you don’t get anything out of that.” I turned around, and he was staring at me. “Think about it, James.”
“Maybe you satisfy my instinct to protect someone.”
“So much so that you’d protect anyone?”
