“There are rumors about someone who wants to change your mind about everything,” Celia said gently. “The question is, will you let him?”
There was a moment of silence. Ivy squinted at her sister. And then, she threw her head back with laughter. Her heart rose into her throat.
“I don’t know if I can!” she cried.
Celia joined her in laughter and squeezed Ivy’s hand. “Try! Please, for the love of God. Try.”
Chapter Thirteen
Autumn 2009
It was October, the week before Tyler’s first birthday, and not long before the Bluebell Cove Autumn Festival. The flower shop was burdened with countless orders for birthday bouquets and flower arrangements for the festival, autumnal wedding bouquets, and boutonnieres for the high school’s fall dance. There were even a few funeral arrangements for older folks from the community—tasks that Ivy performed solemnly, knowing these felt to the living like final gifts to the dead.
She felt grateful that so many people in Bluebell Cove trusted her like this. The flower shop had even been cited as one of the “best new businesses” in the community of Bluebell Cove, lending more proof to Ivy that, in opening the flower shop, she’d done the right thing for herself and her life. When she told Daniel about the praise, he grumbled and left the room. But it wasn’t like that conversation was much different from most of theirs of late. He was a stranger.
At the end of a smog-blue day about two months ago, Daniel had confessed “everything,” or his version of everything. He explained that he’d quit his college classes and spent nearly every day of summer vacation drinking beer and fishing. This was no surprise to Ivy, who’d opened every bill from his community college and hadn’t received one for summer classes nor fall. She’d known he wasn’t at school. He could have been helping with childcare. He could have bonded with his children, both of whom loved him like he was the sky itself. But he didn’t care.
She’d considered asking him what he was up to all day. Why wouldn’t he help her? Why wouldn’t he love her the way she deserved to be loved?
But she’d never been good at talking to him. She felt she was getting worse every year.
Now, Daniel was back at work as a fisherman. The guys at the docks had welcomed him with open, fishy arms and given him back his old fishing boat. She could see the doom and gloom written all over his ruddy face. But she didn’t know how to help him.
That Thursday before everything changed in their lives forever, Ivy was in the kitchen, making dinner for Tyler, Lily, Daniel, and herself. Daniel came home, dropped his things in the foyer, and walked into the kitchen to peck Ivy on the cheek.
“Daddy!” Lily cried, throwing her arms in the air.
Tyler was in his high chair and grinned happily at his father. It was like Christmas morning when he came home. Ivy tried to guard her heart from jealousy.
Dinner was clam chowder and cheese biscuits, Daniel’s favorites. He ate heartily and sloppily, then went into the living room to lie on the sofa. Lily padded after him and sat at the end of the sofa, watching the sports he had on the television, while Ivy took Tyler upstairs to clean him up and get him ready for bed. Tyler was exhausted and fell asleep right away. Lily was harder to drag to bed, as she didn’t want to leave her father.
Daniel surprised Ivy then by offering to take her.
“Are you sure?” Ivy had never once seen Daniel take their children to bed.
But Daniel was already on his tired feet, drawing Lily into his arms. He carried her up the stairs and into her bedroom, leaving Ivy alone in the living room.
Ivy was stumped. She suddenly had more time, so she went to the kitchen, scrubbed the counters, and listened to the radio until Daniel returned and fetched a beer from the fridge. He cracked it open and drank from it, still standing in front of the fridge.
There was a look on his face that Ivy didn’t recognize.
“Did you ever believe in those old sea stories?” he asked.
Ivy turned off the faucet. “Like mermaids and stuff like that?”
“I guess so. Mermaids and sirens and ancient creatures in the deep,” he said.
“I used to,” Ivy said. “Celia and I used to go to the Cove and tell each other scary stories about what was out there in the fog over the water. She used to scare me so bad. But I used to fantasize I was a mermaid, too. That I would one day grow my tail and get in the water and swim away.”
The truth was far more complicated, of course. She’d been nervous to grow a tail, nervous about what life would be like in the ocean without her sisters and family. But she’d always felt different, like an outsider.
“Did you?” Daniel smiled and sat at the kitchen table.
It had been a long time since they’d hung out like this and had a conversation. Ivy wondered if he wanted her to fall in love with him again. She questioned if he wanted to love her again, too. It felt easier than getting divorced and breaking up their family.
Besides, divorce was expensive.
She wondered how many people in the world stayed together because they were afraid of the cost of splitting up.
