His eyebrows shot up. “You’re kidding.”
“I wish.”
“An online relationship with who?”
“Emma.” I never thought it’d hurt to say her name out loud for the first time, but shit. It burned like acid in my throat after what I’d just done. “We met in a Discord and started talking. About Jane Austen of all fucking things, but one thing turned into another and now she knows me better than anyone.”
“Jane Austen? God. Okay, we’re going to circle back to that, but for now, does she know you’re engaged?”
“No.”
“Does she know about Kate at all?”
“No.”
His brow puckered. “Does she know who you are? Because if so, then she sure as fuck knows you’re engaged now. Did you see the news today?”
I sighed and nodded. “Unfortunately.”
“So does she know who you are?” When I hesitated, he tilted his head, studying me with an intensity I didn’t like being on the receiving end of. “Nathaniel.”
“No, okay. No. She doesn’t know my real name,” I muttered. “Or any of the rest of it.”
He stared at me for a long second, processing before he let out a heavy breath through his nose. “But you’re with her, so what does she think your name is?”
“CB.”
“CB? I would’ve understoodWorNathan, but where the hell didCBcome from? Chicago Bears?”
I shook my head. “It’s slightly less manly. It’s actually a play on Colonel Brandon fromSense and Sensibility. I borrowed it for my username on the Discord.”
“Shit, you weren’t kidding about theJane Austenthing.” He let out a low whistle. “She really is a fan then, huh?”
“She’s really not,” I said flatly. “She’s a certified hater who watched a remake movie that sucked so bad, she hopped online and found a Discord strictly to complain.”
He chuckled. “You know, I haven’t even thought about those stories since Mom used to?—”
His eyes widened and I saw the sudden flare of understanding in them when he looked at me again, his expression softening. “Oh. Okay. Well, anyway. So you’re dating this certified Jane Austen hater?”
“We’ve never really talked about it like that, but I’m in love with her, Will. At least, I think I am.”
“Youthinkyou are?” he repeated with a hint of disbelief ringing in his tone. “I’m no expert on this topic, but the way I’ve heard it from Trent, and Alex, and everyone fucking else, it sounds like something youknow. Not something you think.”
“Yeah, but…” I shoved my hands into my pockets, pacing again as I shook my head. “It felt real, okay? Itisreal. Or it was. I don’t know anymore.”
Will gestured at the couch. “Sit down before you wear a trench in my floor.”
I sank into the cushion, propping my elbows on my knees and staring a hole into his rug instead. “Things started feeling different after I met Kate.”
“You mean when she came to Chicago?”
“No, I met her at a conference three years ago.”
He let out a low whistle. “You’ve been emotionally cheating forthree years? Or is it cheating in reverse, since Kate’s the one you’re actually engaged to now? Shit, I’m confused.”
“No. Okay, no. Fuck. I hated Kate,” I said immediately. “Like,hatedher. She’s loud, and argumentative, and she pushes every button I have like it’s an Olympic sport she’s trying to make the team for.”
“And?”
