I don’t have time to feel sorry for myself right now, though. I’ve gotta get my head straight.
“Clint, you alright?” Sawyer asks, taking a step closer.
I grunt, wiping my hand over my face again, trying to shake off the haze that’s clouding my brain. “Yeah. Just… trying to process, you know? Dakota just dropped something heavy on me.”
Sawyer nods understandingly. “Yeah, I know.”
“Youknow? What do you mean, you know?”
My stomach twists, the anger bubbling up like acid.
Sawyer holds up his hands, trying to calm me down before the words can spill out. “Hold on, Clint. Let me explain.”
I step back, a wave of frustration washing over me. “Explain what? You knew? This whole time, you knew about Charlie?”
Sawyer is debating whether or not to speak. I can see him trying to keep his cool, but the tension is too much.
I ball my fists, nails biting into my palms. The last thing I need is someone else keeping secrets from me right now.
“That’s not what I meant,” he says slowly, but I’m not listening.
All I can think about is how Dakota never told me. Never gave me a chance to be part of it from the start.
“Then what the hell did you mean, Sawyer?” I snap, my temper flaring. “She talks to you about this, but not me? I’m the one who’s been right here, helping her with Charlie. I’m the one who’s been getting close to the kid, not you. But you knew about it. You knew, and you didn’t say a damn word to me. What’s that about?”
Sawyer flinches, but he doesn’t back down. His eyes narrow, just enough to show he’s not afraid of me. “I found out moments before you. And I wasn’t told, I worked it out. Charlie looks just like you.”
I stop dead in my tracks, his words cutting through the haze of anger swirling in my head. “You figured it out? You knew… because of how he looks?”
Sawyer’s face hardens, bracing for the storm. “It wasn’t just the way Charlie looks. It was about how he acts. There’s a lot of you in him, Clint. From the way he handles himself with the horses to how he picks up on things. I just… guessed.”
I feel my chest tighten. Charlie. The kid’s been around a lot, asking questions, showing me his curiosity, and I never thought about it.
I was too busy being the guy who got to show him the ropes, too wrapped up in teaching him things that felt natural. But now, it’s a slap in the face.
Every moment with him, every shared laugh, every time we bonded over something as simple as a knot, feels different.
I missed the whole point of what was going on.
“But Dakota has been back in town for a while, and she hasn’t said a thing?—”
“Probably to protect you.”
I shake my head, the words ringing hollow. “I didn’t need protection. I needed the truth. I deserved the truth.”
“You’re right,” Sawyer admits. “You did. But Dakota didn’t do this to hurt you. From what I understand, she didn’t really know you. She was thinking about her son.”
He’s right. Hell, he’s probably more right than I care to admit.
“I just…” I start. “I don’t know what to do with this. With him. I don’t know how to be a father.”
Sawyer’s quiet for a beat, then he gives a small shake of his head. “You don’t have to have it all figured out right now. But you’re already a part of his life. That counts for something.”
I rub my jaw, feeling the roughness of the stubble under my fingers. The reality of it settles deeper now. I’ve spent the last few weeks with Charlie, and I didn’t even know he was my kid.
How the hell do I go from that to being his father?
“I don’t even know what to say to Dakota. Or him. I don’t know how to be that guy. The dad guy. Not after all this time.”
