“But I rememberit?”
“Apparently.”
“That’s your accent?You’re Danish?”
“Yes, you learnt Danish when you came to work for me.”
“Oh.Wolf of the house.Radulf.I knew that.”
“Yes, you did.”
Ben turned to the mirror once more.“I’m soold.”
His boss,Nikolas, offered hesitantly, “I’m forty-five.”
Ben turned, his eyebrows lifted.“Fuck me.”
Nikolas turned sharply away and left.
Ben cursed.
He forgot he wasn’t supposed to swear.
* * *
Nikolas made a sudden, unilateral decision, told Ben he could sleep on the way, and took him home to Devon.
There wasn’t anything very personal there either, he reflected, so it wasn’t going to challenge Ben’s mind unduly.He sent Squeezy on ahead, nevertheless, to move Ben’s clothes into one of the guest suites.
Nikolas elected to drive, which, despite being very tired, Ben clearly found odd.“What exactly are my duties, sir?”This was asked hesitantly as Nikolas took to the outer lane of the M4, the green English countryside spinning past them.
Nikolas took a while to reply but managed calmly enough, “Whatever I decide them to be.Mostly you protect me.I run a charity.”
This non sequitur confused Nikolas, and he’d said it, so he wasn’t surprised when Ben commented wryly, “That dangerous, is it then, sir?Charity work.”
Nikolas actually smiled.There was a first time for everything.
After another few minutes, Ben, gazing out at the scenery asked,
“So, how long have I worked for you, sir?”
“Eight years.”
“Eight years?Christ.That’s a long time, yeah?Is that a long time?”
“Quite long, yes.”
“So, we know each other pretty well?”
Nikolas glanced over.“Why do you ask?Are you remembering things?”
Ben blushed suddenly, just pinpricks of red high up on his defined cheekbones.Nikolas knew every flush in Ben Rider’s repertoire.He caused most of them, after all.Ben didn’t reply to the question and turned back to look out of the window.
After a few more miles, at exactly the same time, Nikolas asked if Ben was hungry and Ben complained he was starving.They both laughed, then frowned, then both coloured, and Nikolas acknowledged deceptively lightly, “You’re always hungry by this point and we always stop.”
Who would have thought it would be the banal, trivial aspects of their missing life together that would hurt so much?Was this like separation after death?If Ben were dead, would it be the remembering of him eating an egg and bacon sandwich and feeding bits to Radulf that would cause Nikolas’s grief-stricken heart to stop?
They carried on.Ben insisted he was fine and wanted to drive.It seemed harmless enough so Nikolas let him.He put the radio on and listened to the worsening situation in the Ukraine.More money coming his way.Good.
