“I don’t know about you, but it hurt like hell, losing you only a few weeks in. I get it. I feel exactly the same. I want you back and I won’t let you go again. How can you be sure? Nothing’s ever sure. But you’ll never know if you don’t take a chance.”
“I’ve committed to the scholarship program,” she says. “I might not get it, but if I do, I can’t turn it down ...”
“I don’t want you to turn it down. What the hell, Lucy? You going to law school would be incredible. You deserve to do that. You’re more than worth it.”
“But it won’t leave much time—”
“You thinkI’mgoing to have much time? I told you I don’t think Ed’s about to drop me in it, not that I’m retiring. I’m always going to work hard. It’s who I am. But I’m driven by a desire to succeed now. Not by a fear of failure.”
“So you wouldn’t get grumpy if I’m in bed, studying for my LSAT or the bar exam or something?”
“Grumpy? No. Especially if you wear a really stern, serious look on your face, and maybe wear some glasses.”
She rolls her eyes. “Pervert.”
“You can’t have everything. I can’t promise that I’m not going to want to get you naked every minute of the day. And that’s probably going to last forever. So if that’s a deal-breaker for you ...” I hold up my hands in mock surrender.
“Three days a month I’m unbearable. Like, I’m a hormonal monster.”
“Only three days a month?”
She grins. “I’m serious. It might be too much for you.”
“You’re entirely too good for me, but never too much. You’re a perfect amount. For me.”
She bites back a smile, but she looks nervous. “I’ve spent my entire life a little bit broken. Mom chipping away bit by bit ... But I’ve never felt so breakable as I did when you said you wanted to take a step back. I can’t do that again.” She reaches for me.
“I promise you won’t have to.” I cup her face in my hands and bring my forehead to hers. “I’m going to keep you safe for the rest of our lives.”
“Forever?”
“Longer, if possible.” I press a small kiss against her lips.
“Wentworth was always my favorite Austen hero.” She exhales, and the tightness leaves her body. We’re joined. Connected. Back together, forever.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Lucy
Hunter turning up and declaring his undying love for me wasn’t what I was expecting this sunny New York day. But it was exactly what I needed. I thought handsome men making grand declarations of love was the kind of thing that only ever happened to women like my sister or in the novels of Jane Austen. Up until recently I’ve felt like a supporting character in everyone else’s life. Today, Hunter made me feel like a leading lady. The heroine of my own story.
Hunter explaining how his perceptions of the world have shifted rang true for me too. His honesty, his vulnerability, the pain I saw in him when he talked about his father. Hunter is no longer running. And that’s what it took for me to believe everything that Hunter was saying about loving me was true. Maybe that’s also what it took for me to accept my own feelings about him. All I know is that Hunter collapsed every single one of my defenses today, but I’ve never felt so safe. So loved.
He believes in me when I don’t have enough faith for myself. And I know he’s going to be brilliant even when he doubts himself. We understand and accept each other’s flaws and are better because of them.We’re far from perfect, but we fit together like each one of us doesn’t quite work without the other.
I’ve met the love of my life. And he loves me back. I’m not sure life gets better than that. It’s more than I could have ever hoped for myself.
The thing about New York is that even when you reconcile with the love of your life during your lunch hour, capitalism still calls. Five minutes after Hunter told me he wanted to be with me forever, I headed back to my desk and he to his.
In buildings next door to each other.
I tried to leave on time, but a last-minute motion in a live trial meant I had to work late.
I finally buzz up to Hunter’s apartment, exhausted from what feels like the longest day ever.
“I don’t want to live in Brooklyn,” he says as he opens the door.
A surge of energy moves through me. It’s so good to see him. So good to know we’re moving forward and not taking steps back. Now is the beginning of our shared life together. The path to get here has been difficult and treacherous. But somehow, looking at Hunter, I know everything’s going to be a little easier now. “I want you to move in.”
