Dennis watches me for a moment before he chimes in. “I get your worry. You being the older woman, and by quite a lot of years, is really unorthodox. You look great now at forty, but you might not look so great at fifty, especially having had a kid later in life.”
“Dennis! That’s so rude! I can’t believe you’d say that. Shari, don’t listen to him! My god, have some flipping tact, Miller!”
“No, no, he’s absolutely right! In ten years I’ll be fifty and saggy, and Brad will be in his early thirties and potentially only just hitting his prime! Think of all the gorgeous women that will probably be throwing themselves at him all the time. What’s to say one of them wouldn’t turn his head, and then he comes home to Droopy McMenopause and he’s like,fuck this,I’m gonna go get me a younger hottie!”
“He would never?—”
“Max, honey, we don’t know that. Shari clearly wants me to play devil’s advocate. And she’s right! He could well come home one day and be like,no thanks, I’m done.”
“Dennis!” Max smacks his arm with the back of her hand.
“Hear me out! I’m not saying he will do it, but hecould.And that’s where your real fear is, am I right? Not so much what people say to your face right now to be mean, although that does suck, but the fact that in a few years he might agree.”
I feel the sting of pressure behind my eyes, but I am so sick of crying, so I just nod once, jaw clenched.
“But so could any guy! Say you decide to just co-parent and in the future you start dating someone our age, who’s to say that guy wouldn’t have a midlife crisis and trade you in for a younger model? It’s always a possibility, but it all depends on the guy,” Max hedges.
That gives me pause, because I’d never stopped to consider thathisage might not even be the issue. That my fear of him changing his mind might not even be an age gap thing, but just a basicI want a younger womanthing. Which makesmyage the issue.
“I’m not trying to put you off all men, hun. Just making a point that Brad’s age might be irrelevant to this particular fear. Really, the only question that actually has any validity is: do you believe Brad is like that?”
My immediate answer? No. But how can I be sure?
“Ultimately, you have to decide if he’s worth the risk.”
“Mmmm, it’s not the only question,” Dennis states, tipping his hand back and forth in a so-so motion. “I’m also trying really hard not to ask if youdosuck like a hoover.”
My laughter takes off as Max lobs a cushion at his face.
15
WOW, SO THEY’RE TOFF RICH
SHARI
23rd September 2023
It'sBrad's twenty-third birthday today, and we've just arrived at his beach party.Webeing me and my besties. Thank fuck they're with me, because I've never felt quite as self conscious as I do right now. There are about fifty people here, and they're all in their early twenties. Every. Single. One. The array of flat stomachs, perky tits, and the lack of cellulite is enough to make me want to bolt.
Sure, it'll be fun to ogle the washboard abs of some of the guys here, but I'm this close to turning around right now and it's only Max's arm linked in mine that's stopping me.
“Oh god, this was a terrible idea. We should just go. He hasn't even seen us yet, so it's not like he'll notice our retreat! I'll just text him in a bit and tell him I'm...sick? Morning sickness! Yes! He'll never question that,” I blurt, panicked.
Max's grip on my arm tightens as she all but drags me forward, my flip-flops sinking into the powdery soft sand withevery forced step. “Shari, you listen to me right now. You are gorgeous! You barely look older than most of the people here.” I raise an eyebrow at that as a girl bounces past us. Literally, her ass and boobs bounce with every step. My body parts don't bounce, they wobble. “Ok, maybe a bit older, but not out of place! At all! Just trust me on that.”
“Fuck me, they're young,” Jaime almost shouts as she sidles up next to me and drops her cooler at our feet. Elle is already spreading out a huge picnic blanket that we'll unroll our towels on, because the more barriers from sand in your crotch, the better. We also have camping chairs, a parasol and hand fans if it gets too hot, and a pharmacy's worth of sunscreen and aloe vera gel. Because we're old and experienced and smart, damnit!
The smell of barbecued meat mixes with the briny air and I’m thankful my morning sickness stage has actually abated now I’m well into my second trimester.
“My god, just look at all those abs! Do guys today just workout nonstop? The beach bodies twenty years ago definitely didn't look like this,” Elle muses.
“Amen to that, sista.” Jaime shields her eyes from the sun and looks to the row of stunning mini beach houses behind us. “How did Brad get the use of these cabins and the private beach again?”
Distractedly, I reply as I rub more sunscreen into my shoulders, “Hmm? Oh, one of his friends' family owns the resort. Torbyn, I believe?”
“Wow, so they're toff rich. Nice of them to do that, though, especially as it's the end of peak season.”
“I know, right? But there's something to do with it being part of Torbyn's graduation present too. I think.”
