“Fuck it, I can rest when I get home.”
5
YOU LET A CHILD IMPREGNATE YOU?!
SHARI
7th June2023
I stareout my windscreen at the three-storey, pale brick house before me. A house that's as familiar to me as my own, and yet I can't help the uneasy feeling running through my veins as I sit here.
Ever since the bomb my doctor dropped on me yesterday, I've been trying to figure out how I'll tell the girls. What I'll tell them too. Not that I plan to hold anything back, but they'll have questions and I don't have all the answers yet.
Thankfully, thewhento tell them decision was made for me since we already had dinner at Max's planned for tonight.
I drag myself to the house and push open the door with a very unconvincing rendition of my usual greeting, “I’m here, so put it away, Dennis.”
A chorus ofAuntie Shari!sounds from all corners of the house, and a stampede of children slams into me for hugs and kisses. This never gets old and will always be my favourite way tobe greeted. Except for the helicopter tail and clickety-clacking of dancing paws when I get home. That's mytruefavourite.
My lack of flair when I entered definitely caught the adults' attention, though, as several pairs of furrowed brows meet my gaze from the kitchen door. I take a deep breath to prepare myself for the third degree, and the familiar smell of bergamot and ylang-ylang that always fills this house helps to calm me. A little.
Max shoos the kids back off to play whatever they were in the middle of when I arrived and hugs me. “Hey babe. What's going on, are you ok?”
“Yep!” Must stop squeaking. I clear my throat and try again, “I’m good, just...tired?”
Elle steps forward to hug me. “Why did that sound like a question?”
She's shoved aside by Jaime, who grabs me by the shoulders and looks me dead in the eye. “Nah, something's going on. Girl meeting, stat!” She spins me towards the kitchen and marches me through to sit at the breakfast bar.
Max's husband, Dennis, rounds the island for a quick hug, followed closely by Isaiah. Guess he and Jaime are on again. I knew their breakup wouldn’t last, it never does.
“Hey, Shari. Everything ok? You didn't even sound like you cared if I had it all hanging out,” Dennis jokes, his blue eyes probing. I’ve always found it fascinating that their twin boys take after a parent each. They both have their dad’s blue eyes, but Tevis has red hair and pale skin like Dennis, and Tyree has dark hair and tan skin like Max.
I force a smile. “Yes, I'm fine, honestly. Just feeling a bit drained is all.”
“Hey Shari Ferrari.”
“Hey bible boy.”
Isaiah smiles at my nickname for him as he gives me a quick peck on the cheek.
As much as I hate him for breaking Jaime's heart repeatedly, they can be as bad as each other, sometimes. They need to get their shit together, because this on again off again bollocks is too toxic for their little boy to witness.
Jaime plonks a glass of rosé down in-front of me as Max herds Dennis to the door. “Go play with the kids for a bit.”
Dennis's eyes flick from her to me and back, nods, and reluctantly leaves, dragging Isaiah with him. Bet those little fiends will be eavesdropping. Men are so much worse than women when it comes to gossip.
“Ok, spill,” Jaime demands, always straight to the point.
Elle grabs my hand, “Are you sure you're ok? You don't seem yourself.”
“I…um, well, I mean, I'm fine. Medically speaking but?—”
“Medically speaking?” Max shrieks. “What does that even mean? Have you been worried about your health? Why wouldn't you tell us?!”
“No, no, no! Ok, that was terrible wording, I haven't been dealing with health issues. Don't worry. Just, um, I don’t…”
I don't know why I'm struggling to say the words. I think part of me is scared to make it real. And an even bigger part might be scared that it's not.
