I didn’t need anyone inserting themselves in my personal business anymore. My problems with my mom were just that, my problems. Plus, I missed the Vandross’s. I talked to them on the phone every now and then but that wasn’t enough. They kept me employed since I was a teen and understood my struggle with no judgement.
I wanted to see their genuine faces, hug them, and give them a gift of appreciation. They were the only ones that really looked out for me on the days I didn’t have shit. They would sometimes pay me in advance, then turn around and say it was a gift and still give me my whole paycheck without deducting what they took. They were really like second parents to me and I couldn’t wait to see their faces.
I already had my hotel room booked and rental car ready for when I touched down out there. I had the shit that I would need because I planned on staying out there for two weeks to makesure my mom was good. The goal was to really stay for only a week, but I told my workers two weeks just in case, to be on the safe side.
I thought back to my last time with King and how much I enjoyed him. He opened up and warmed up to me, laughed with me and didn’t just one word me. I actually got good conversation with him and knew his dislikes, as well as likes. We actually had so much shit in common. The only thing we didn’t have in common was selfishness. King wanted his cake and to eat it too, just like every other man. I was not ready to settle down no time soon. I just felt like we could be respectful towards one another. I wouldn’t throw niggas up in his face, although I didn’t have any niggas. He chased the only man that I was enjoying away.
All I wanted from King was respect. I didn’t want him flaunting other girls in my face, nor did I want him talking on the phone with them around me. He knew I liked him a lot, just like I knew he liked me.
I didn’t want our friendship to be based upon a tit for tat game, so I decided to end it before deeper feelings got developed. I didn’t want our friendship toxic so, although it bothered me, I did the one thing I didn’t want to do and that was block him for a while. I thought about him daily, the massage, the gifts and the way he made me feel secure.
I just personally felt like right now was not a good time to entertain the thought of King. The more we fucked and stayed around each other the more the lines would get blurred between the two of us. We both had healing to do in my opinion and the best way to accomplish that was time apart.
After I got settled in at my hotel, I made a couple of calls and checked in on my workers. I hopped in my rental car and made my way to my mom’s house. I reminded myself to go check in on the Vandross’s once I got this first dramatic visit out the way. In my purse was five thousand dollars. That amount would probably make her money hungry ass faint.
I also prayed that she really put most of this money to good use although I knew most of it was going to go to her bad habits. While I was out here, I was going to make sure that I took her to her doctor’s appointments to get her situated.
I pulled up to my childhood home and automatically felt an eerie feeling in my stomach. I pushed the feeling to the side and got out the car. I took note that there were no crackheads hanging around, which was unusual but it made me feel comfortable that nobody was here.
I took a deep breath then trekked up the uneven concrete up to the front door. I didn’t even bother to knock because I already knew the front door was unlocked. Soon as I opened the door, the sight of my mom sitting on the couch looking half dead caused tears to well up in my eyes. I felt like shit for leaving her out here. She was basically rotting out. My mom was already skinny when I left but, now, she looked like she would break in half if she turned the wrong way.
“Momma.” I croaked out.
My bottom lip trembled as I made my way across the room. I fell to my knees and laid my head in her lap. Her knee dug sharply into the side of my face. She moved a little to acknowledge me. I ignored the strong odor of piss radiating off of her as more tears escaped my eyes.
“Layloni, you really came.” She weakly sat up a little nudging me off of her.
I sat up on my knees and took in the area next to her on the cracked-up leather couch. The first thing that broughtdisappointment to me was her crack pipe. She was currently high as hell, and there was no way I was handing her over some money this second.
“Did you bring my money girl?” She asked, racking her thin sharp nails up and down her ashy arm.
“Yes mom.” I smiled weakly blinking back tears.
“You always did have a heart of gold like your dad… I wonder why you love someone as fucked up as me.” She scoffed with a brittle laugh.
I remained silent, my eyes landed on all sorts of open wounds and bruises all over her body. She looked terrible but acted as though her appearance didn’t bother her. It bothered me so bad; I wanted to break down and cry. Her once long hair was in patches. The tank top she had on had holes and dried up blood on it.
“Momma, I gotta get you to the hospital, come on.” I stood to my feet and attempted to pull her up, but she fought against me.
“This reunion is up!” She slapped her hands together. “I got shit to do! Prince, Glen!!! Get y’all black asses out here and give me my money!”
She snatched away from me hard. My eyes damn near popped out of its sockets when I heard her say a name that I did not want to hear.
I know she didn’t set me up like this… I thought just as Glen stepped out the hallway followed by a tall dark skin older guy. Me and Glen’s eyes locked momentarily, the guy with him casually stepped to my mom and handed her two rubber bands full of money.
“I told you, bitch!” My mom cheered, breaking my trance. “My son in law looks out for me! Ten thousand dollars cash and I-”
POW!
I screeched. My mouth fell ajar, everything seemed to move in slow motion like I was stuck in a twilight zone. I blinked my eyes, opened my mouth but nothing came out. I had to be dreaming, the more I batted my eyes the worse the scene in front of me got.
My mom’s body still sitting upward with money in her hands… with no head attached to her neck.
“NOOOOOOO mommmyyy, pleassseeee! Please don’t leave me!” I dropped down to my knees and frantically crawled towards her.
The guy yawned, stepped to the side before I threw myself into her lap.
“Mommy?” I wailed.
