"Then that's all that matters," Amber says.
"Can I ask one more thing?" Holly says.
"Sure."
"We all read DDlg books and we all identify as littles. I want to know though, what does being a little mean to you, specifically?"
I bite my lip. "It means being able to drop the adult mask sometimes. To be playful and silly and not always in control. For me being a little is letting someone else make the decisions when I'm overwhelmed and to be taken care of without feeling like I'm being infantilized."
"Does he call you baby? Little one? That sort of thing?"
"Sweetheart mostly. Sometimes baby. And once..." Heat floods my face. "This morning, I called him Daddy."
The room erupts again.
"How did that feel?" Madison asks, clearly fascinated.
"Right. Terrifying and right. Like I'd been holding that word inside forever and finally let it out."
"What did he do when you said it?"
"Groaned. Called me his good girl. Then proceeded to make me count every swat while explaining why I needed to take better care of myself."
"That's hot," Holly says again. "Like, genuinely hot."
"It was. But it was also more than that. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt that kind of intimacy with someone, it’s a connection unlike any I’ve known, built entirely on trust. I trusted him to know when to stop, not go overboard and also balance so I had enough." I look around at my friends. "I've had sex before. But I've never experienced anything like this. Where my body and my emotions and my needs are all tangled together and someone sees all of it and loves all of it."
"That's what you deserve," Emily says softly. "Someone who sees all of you and loves all of you."
"Ethan does. Even the messy parts."
Chloe comes over and hugs me. "I'm happy for you, Lily. Really happy."
One by one, the other girls join in until we're all tangled together in a group hug.
"Thank you," I whisper. "For understanding and being here for me."
"Always," Madison says. "That's what we're here for."
We pull apart, and I wipe at my eyes.
"So," Maya says, grinning. "When do we get to interrogate Ethan about all this?"
"Never. Absolutely never."
"Too late," Amber says, showing me her phone. "I already texted him to come to the next meeting."
"You didn't!"
"I did. And he said yes. Something about wanting to meet the women who are important to you."
My heart swells. Of course he did.
"He's going to charm you all," I warn.
"Good," Holly says. "We want to be charmed. And then we want to make sure he knows that if he hurts you, we have very specific plans involving his medical license and a lot of angry women."
I laugh despite myself. "You guys are the best."
