“You don’t need to beg,” I promise with a rasp. “Maybe I’m just more protective of you than you are of yourself when it comes to me.” He shakes his head gingerly because he must disagree.
We say nothing and just keep our eyes locked.
Until his thumb taps my lips twice, and I want to take his thumb into my mouth, but his eyes squint and his vision narrows over my shoulder. “Ah shit, Jet got into the yard.”
I quickly follow his line of sight to the dog wagging his tail in the middle of the yard, with his tail up as dirt gets kicked into the air from his shoveling paws. I can’t help but laugh in hysterics. This evening really is going in all directions.
Carter lets me go and opens the sliding door to shoo the dog back home. I walk to the kitchen to grab the secret jar of treats and return to Carter. “Here. You know these will only make him return since he knows he has you wrapped around his little paw.”
He yanks the jar from my hand and grumbles a sound before throwing a treat long-distance into a neighbor’s yard. “Well, now the Wilkinsons can deal with him. I’ll send Oliver a text.”
Carter does just that, and I sit at the counter to nibble on my sandwich. “This is the world’s best sandwich. You give it extra magic.”
His brows furrow. “Was that supposed to be a cheesy line?”
I drop the sandwich and laugh with a full mouth. “No. Seriously, you have the right ratio of peanut butter to jelly, and it’s whole wheat bread.”
He clucks his tongue and proudly smirks. “I have skills.” Carter takes a big bite of his sandwich while he leans over the counter. “You’ve mentioned a few times all the places you’ve seen while you were away. Did it fill your quota? Was it what you hoped?”
“No,” I answer bluntly and surprise myself how quickly that came out. It was spent missing him, and I carried my heavy choices in my backpack. He stands at attention and seems perplexed by my response. “Look, you said we can kind of have a blank slate, so let’s do that. We can remember the good parts and that’s that.”
Thankfully, he doesn’t press. “Okay, the good parts. There were many.”
“I agree.”
“You’ve always been a little eccentric and unpredictable but in a good way most of the time.”
I give him a pointed look. “Someone had to not be grumpy. Besides, you’re… Underneath it all, you have a free spirit, too. It’s just that it only seems to come out when you’re with someone.”
He doesn’t reply, and that’s fine. We both grasp that someone was me and should always be me.
“I’m going to put this food away. Want anything?”
I shake my head. “Nah. You do kitchen duty, and I will let the trolls get settled in their new home right next to the white-musk candle.”
He chuckles and begins to move plates. “I’m slightly scared for your birth plan.”
“Me too. I haven’t thought about it too much, but we’re going natural.”
“You do you.”
“You might not be saying that when I’m ripping your arm off from pain.”
He only smiles to himself, and we both focus on our own tasks. Twenty minutes later, dishes are cleared, and the living room shelf appears a little less bare. Still, something is missing from this evening, and I’m afraid to admit what it is.
For the next hour we talk about the latest in Everhope and my family. A bit about some of the countries that I visited and some of the stories from his job that I missed. I swoon when he said that as mayor, he will ensure there is another playground in town, with a wading pool for little kids.
Basically, the nerves that I had at the start of the night are no more. This is exactly what we both needed to take a step forward.
It’s when we are upstairs after turning off the downstairs lights for the night that I realize we aren’t taking just a step forward, we might be taking two.
But I don’t say anything. We nod to one another good night and go our separate ways. Except, after I brush my teeth and throw on an old t-shirt, I realize that sleeping alone causes that soaring level of loneliness, and I hear thunder in the distance. A storm is coming. They always make me feel uneasy. We had a lot of tornadoes growing up.
I sigh and stare at the bed. Clicking my tongue a few times, I debate.
Then give up.
Pivoting, I slowly walk to the door of Carter’s room. He left it open.
