My stomach fills with nausea. If I admit the truth now, then he will be shattered. And he’s already had a few bad years. What have I done? I had no clue he was interested, except deep down, I probably did but kept it locked up.
“I mean, with you busy with your hockey career, we don’t see one another as much. But Summer? We seem to bond closer,” he continues, but my ears seem to be buzzing.
I’m his big brother. I’ve watched him suffer, and I feel guilty that it wasn’t me. He seems excited and happy. Even though I know Summer isn’t interested, they will be together more than I will with Summer, that’s what my professionallife does. I don’t want him to be alone.Because even if he makes a move, Summer will laugh it off and get them back on track as friends.
Except if she’s with me? He’ll resent us both, and he’ll be miserable.
Everything inside of me twists.
There is a long silence between us. My brother stares at me, and maybe he is reading my mind or he’s completely oblivious, but it feels as though an unspoken warning seems to be sent from him.
And that’s enough for me.
My lips partfrom the bruising kiss between me and Summer as we sit in the front of my car. Our noses nuzzle, and I wish I could take more.
“Don’t do this,” she whispers.
“You shouldn’t have followed me.” I’m desperate to get as far from her as possible. I barely drank, a few sips really. Getting away from the party and the house is the only way I might breathe tonight.
I shake my head, bracing myself for the struggle not to touch her as I sink back into my seat. “We can’t make this work.”
Summer sighs. “That’s a lie. You’re telling me that you spoke to Zac and now you say that we have no future. What aren’t you telling me?” She’s begged me to explain, but all I can do is break up with her and use a lie.
“I’ve thought about it more, with my hockey schedule and you living in Lake Spark. Zac just pointed out the obvious. There is no realistic way for us to work. You’ll be miserable and so will I.” I do my best to avoid her eyes.
She turns, with her sight landing on me as her head stays put against the headrest. I always love the way the light from my dashboard reflects off her beautiful face.
She turns away from me to look out the window, doing her best to stay composed.
“You can blame me, Summer,” I rasp. I can’t tear my eyes away from her as I watch her crumble. “I’m doing this so in the long run your heart doesn’t break even harder.”
An unamused sound leaves her lips. “So just do it now, is that it?”
I start the engine with every intention of taking her home. We need to part ways because the air around us is insufferable right now.
Unbearable silence fills my car as I drive us away from my house.
“You’ll change your mind in the morning when you realize how much of a mistake this is,” she tells me softly.
“I know you. You have a kind heart. Nor do you want to be that girl that gets between two brothers. Tell me that isn’t true?” I challenge.
Her face bows down, and she goes quiet for a second. “You’re right.”
“It’s why you will let me walk. You have to let me walk away.”
“You’ll change your mind.”
My heart is ripping into pieces. “I won’t, Summer.” I feel my throat strain, as I don’t want to talk but I have to. I swallow. “Sometimes we have to let go, and that’s what we need to do. We had a few great months, but we need to just…”
The sound of her sniffling is torment. My entire body tenses, and I want to escape the vehicle.
But I can’t because I feel the wheel of the car shift, and my hands lose grip as we swivel.
It happens so fast.And it isn’t until we crash and the airbags deflate that I realize I must have lost grip of the wheel. I can’t process if it’s a tree we hit or something else, I’m not sure, because there are a thousand thoughts in my head.
I don’t even worry about myself, even though I feel an ache somewhere. But when I glance to my side, my heart drops when I see Summer has blood gushing down her face.
I watchfrom the doorway of the hospital room with my arms crossed, leaning against the doorframe as the nurse finishes bandaging Summer’s head. An airbag and a broken window caused Summer to need stiches that the doctor said will probably scar. There’s bruising on her body, plus abrasions on her chin. Not to mention, her arm is probably going to ache for days. Are we lucky on the car crash front? We aren’t on any other front.
