The words feel like glass in my mouth, but I say them anyway.
Because loving him isn’t enough.
Not if it gets my son killed.
37
GIO
The door closes behind Stephanie, and though it was gentle, it feels like she slammed it in my face.
She wouldn’t even let me take them home, and that is a louder statement than anything else she could have done.
I don’t move. I don’t breathe. I just stand there in the entryway, the scent of her lingering in the air like smoke after a gunshot, and I’m already dying for another hit of it.
Jackson’s goodbye still echoes in my ears, high and small and final.
She didn’t raise her voice.
She didn’t need to. Just a few quiet words, a hand on her son’s shoulder, and she was walking away from me for good.
At least that’s what she thinks.
No, I’m not going to be that guy. I’m not going to follow her or beg her or keep showing up at her door.
She’s made her choice, and I can’t blame her for it.
My family, my life… it’s nothing but bullets and blood.
And now that Kenji’s dead, she and Jackson will be safe.
I keep telling myself that. It should make letting them go easier, knowing that the last man who knew about me and her is rotting in the ground.
But it doesn’t.
Because I know I’ll never be the same without them.
My whole damn world revolves around Stephanie and her little boy. I’m crazy about them—willing to do anything to be a part of their lives, if only she would let me.
“Did Stephanie leave?” My brother Leo appears beside me, staring at the door in confusion while emotions roil inside me.
I don’t answer. Instead, I turn and head toward Miko’s study. “I need a drink.”
When I get to the wet bar, I uncork the whiskey and pour a generous amount into a lowball glass—then down the whole thing in one gulp before pouring another.
The alcohol burns as it slides down my throat, but that pain is far more tolerable than the gaping chasm Stephanie left in my chest, and I’m eager for the numbness that inebriation will bring.
I hear the door swing open behind me, but I don’t turn. Instead, I down my second shot and pour a third.
“Help yourself,” Miko says dryly, and I raise my glass above my shoulder in silent salute.
“You want to tell us what happened?” Raf asks.
Oh, good. They’re all here.
I turn around to face my four brothers, and a sliver of relief wheedles its way into my core when I find Anika and Sora haven’t joined them.
As much as I love and respect my two sisters-in-law, I’m not sure I can take pity right now.
