He’s asleep within minutes, the adrenaline wearing off.
Gio sits across from us, his eyes never leaving me.
And in that moment, I know.
This can’t be our life.
Even surrounded by warmth, by people who care, there’s a constant undercurrent of danger.
Gio’s family will always have enemies.
Jackson will never be entirely safe here, no matter how much they love him.
And despite the self-doubt that had started to trickle in about my decision to cut Gio from our lives, this experience has only intensified my reasoning behind it.
I wait until the brothers are busy in the next room and Gio and I are alone.
Then I reach deep inside myself to find the strength to break all three of our hearts once again. “Gio…” My voice feels strange in my throat.
He leans forward, forearms on his knees. “Yeah?”
I swallow, forcing the words out even as they tear at me. “I hope you know this doesn’t change anything.”
His eyes narrow, like he’s not sure he heard me right. “What do you mean?”
“This isn’t safe. Not for Jackson. Not for me. Tonight just proved that.” I grip my hands together to keep them from shaking. “I’m grateful—God, I’m so grateful you came for us. But I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep wondering if the next enemy will find us before you do.”
He stares at me, jaw tight. “You think I wouldn’t protect you? Protect him?”
“I know you would. That’s the problem. You’d die trying. And one day, you might not make it in time.” My voice cracks, and I look away. “I can’t live like that. And I won’t make Jackson live like that.”
He doesn’t move for a long moment. Then, quietly, “I understand.”
I blink back tears as I turn my attention to Jackson, gently combing his hair away from his face to rouse him. “Jackson, honey, it’s time to wake up and go home.”
He mumbles something, then sits up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes as he yawns.
My heart clenches as Gio crouches in front of him, his big hands settling on Jackson’s small shoulders.
“You take care of your mom, alright, kid?”
Jackson nods sleepily. “Will I see you again?”
Gio glances at me, then shakes his head. “No, bud. It’s best if I stay away.”
Jackson’s lip trembles.
He looks like he wants to argue, but instead, he throws his arms around Gio’s neck.
Gio holds him for a long moment, his eyes closed, his hand splayed across Jackson’s back like he’s memorizing the feel of him.
And the sight of them saying goodbye absolutely crushes me. It’s all I can do not to sob, but I have to be strong.
For Jackson.
When our little boy finally pulls back, Gio stands, his gaze locking with mine. “If you ever need me?—”
I shake my head. “Please, Gio. Don’t contact us again.”
