Silence.
The doctor warned me to not get too overly active, otherwise it could alter the healing process and my new heart taking. I usually tried to keep my stress levels down and my mind as calm as possible, but everything inside of me was telling me to break down the door.
“Ruby! Goddamn it, open the door.”
Nothing. Not even a sob answered me.
Fuck it, I’ll replace her goddamn door.
Violent pain ran down my shoulder as I hit with everything I had, blowing the flimsy door wide open until I was toppling into the bathroom.
Her pain-filled eyes met mine, tears spilling down her cheeks as she held the tiny little razor to her wrist in disappointment.
“I thought this would work…” she cried.
Her naked body was hunched over, almost like it was in an upright fetal position as she kept trying to slice at her wrist. She probably would’ve been more successful had she tried to break it apart, but I think she was just too exhausted emotionally to really think about it.
Grabbing a fluffy white towel from off the drying rack, I approached, turning the water off so I could wrap her in the towel. I wasn’t even trying to sneak a peek; I was too focused on saving this beautifully broken woman before me.
“Why don’t you let me have this, Ruby?” I whispered, gently pulling the pink, plastic razor from her hand.
“It always leaves cuts on my legs…” she said absentmindedly. “I thought it would work.”
The pain in her eyes hit me so hard I almost lost my balance. God, this woman was suffering so fucking much, and I almost felt helpless, like anything I did or said in this moment wouldn’t matter.
Twice she’s tried to kill herself.
Twice I’ve intervened.
I helped her up to her feet, and took her into the bedroom, my eyes instantly scanning for anything that might be a threat.
The bottle of pills she’d taken was long gone, but there were plenty of things in her room she could break–things that could kill her if she really tried.
This is going to be very difficult.
There was a pretty red dress hanging in her closet, so I quickly grabbed it and handed it to her. “Here, Ruby. I’m going to turn my back, and you need to put this on, okay?”
She nodded weakly, taking the dress from my hands.
Her tears were still falling like tiny streams down her face, and it broke me that I couldn’t help her like I wanted to.
I turned my back, listening as the bed creaked beneath her body and the towel hit the ground. A few seconds later, she cleared her throat. “Okay, you can turn around now.”
My gaze lingered on her tears, and my heart clenched when I saw the utter devastation in her eyes.
“I bet you think I’m crazy,” she mumbled, sitting back down on her bed. “I wouldn’t blame you if you did.”
Tempestuous emotion overpowered me as I carefully lowered myself onto her bed, trying to figure out the best way to approach her without scaring her off. This broke so many rules… if the hospital knew she tried to take her life again, they’d call for me to bring her back in.
But I wasn’t sure if she could survive that. Not when she was this fucking damaged.
“Tell me about Chase,” I prodded, breaking the awkward silence, refusing to answer her question. Did I think she was crazy? Yes, but not in the ways she was thinking. My head was thinking about all the reasons why she shouldn’t take her life, how it would be a shame for someone this beautiful to leave me alone on this earth.
Maybe I’m the one that is crazy?I barely know this woman, yet it feels like I’ve known her for my whole damn life.
She sniffed, wiping some stray tears from her cheeks. “He was the best,” she whimpered. “So protective and strong. He always had my back… always.” She looked at me with a hooded, almost vacant stare. “But I didn’t have his. I should’ve never let him drive that night.”
It was risky, but I took her hand, curling my fingers around the soft milky skin covered in faint freckles. Her gaze met mine, and I lost myself in those freakishly blue colored eyes that reminded me of the deepest parts of the sea.
