Aspen bit her lip and nodded.
“Baby…” Tears welled in Eve’s eyes as she swept her thumb in a gentle arc over Aspen’s heart. “I don’t know what happens next,” she whispered. “I wish I did. I just know that I don’t want to lose this.” Her touch was soft and soothing as she continued to paint slow, steady stripes over Aspen’s chest. “I don’t want to lose you.”
Aspen’s eyes fluttered at the tenderness that warmed Eve’s voice. “I don’t want to lose you, either.”
Eve smiled. “So we’ll work with that.” Her breaths fell slow and steady against Aspen’s lips as she nuzzled her cheek. “Ineed to prep for a show I’m doing in Los Angeles at the end of January, and I’m guest-lecturing at the University of the Arts in London for two weeks at the end of April, but the time in-between and after…” Her voice trailed off, and she kissed Aspen softly. “I don’t really have tobeanywhere.”
Aspen pressed Eve’s hand harder to her chest. “I want you with me.”
“I want that, too,” Eve murmured.
Aspen managed a weak smile. Her panic lessened as she lost herself in the sincerity that shimmered in Eve’s eyes. “Thank you.”
Eve pressed her hand to Aspen’s heart. “I didn’t do anything.”
“You did,” Aspen whispered. She closed her eyes as she confessed, “I was halfway to an anxiety attack when you woke up and stopped it in its tracks.”
“Oh, darling,” Eve sighed, sounding like she was close to tears. “Why were you panicking?”
“Because I don’t like not knowing what comes next.” She caressed the back of Eve’s hand. “And I’m afraid… I’m afraid the distance between Aspen and New York will get to be too much, eventually, and—”
“Baby, open your eyes and look at me,” Eve pleaded.
Aspen drew a long, deep breath and let it go slowly as she summoned the strength to do what Eve asked. And then her heart broke when she saw the tears shining in Eve’s eyes. “Eve…”
Eve’s eyes glowed like blue fire as she kissed her softly. “Even if the distance between Aspen and New York is too much, the distance between Aspen and Eve doesn’t have to be.”
It was a stupid, cheesy line more befitting some ridiculous Hallmark holiday movie than real life, but god if it didn’t do the trick as it sliced through Aspen’s lingering dread to pull a quiet huff of a laugh from her lips. “You’re too much.”
Eve’s eyes crinkled with joy. “In a good way?”
Aspen nodded and stroked her fingers over the back of Eve’s hand that was still pressed against her heart. “In the best way, beautiful girl.”
“I meant it, though,” Eve said, brushing a smile of a kiss to Aspen’s lips. “I’m not delusional enough to think that the distance won’t become an issue, but we will figure it out.”
Aspen wanted to say she that really hoped they could, but what came out instead was, “I hate New York.”
“I know, baby,” Eve shared in a hushed voice, like she was confessing a secret. “That doesn’t surprise me.”
Aspen frowned. Why was Eve so calm about this? “But that’s where your life is.”
“For now,” Eve agreed. “But it doesn’t have to be. We have time,” she murmured, echoing Aspen’s words from when they’d only just met. “We’ll figure it out.”
I don’t need time to figure it out. I love you. I want you here with me. Every day and always, I want you here with me.Aspen licked her lips and, knowing she couldn’t say that, settled for a soft, “Okay.”
“Wewillfigure it out,” Eve repeated, her voice low and ringing with a confidence Aspen couldn’t help but believe in.
“I know.”
“I’m not letting you go,” Eve whispered vehemently.
“Please don’t,” Aspen begged as she dragged her right hand up Eve’s back to tangle her fingers in her hair and hold her close.
“I won’t,” Eve swore, the words soft as a rose petal against Aspen’s lips. Her eyelids fluttered as she nuzzled closer. “I won’t ever let you go.”
So, Eve lied.
Not on purpose, of course. And not in the grand scheme of things, because she very much intended on doing whatever she could to keep Aspen in her life. But as she sat beside Aspen in the car on their way to the airport with their fingers tangled together on Aspen’s thigh and a sinking feeling in her stomach, she couldn’t deny that she may have been a little cavalier in declaring that she’d never let Aspen go.
