“Why?” I whisper.
“Our power comes from Gaia. From the Earth. I've never known her to take away what she's given.” Mum says as she stares across the lake as if it will give her answers.
“Have you ever known her to bond her son to a Nymph who rejects him?” I mumble. “Who wants to choose someone else that will make her Dad and the pack proud?”
“No...” She mutters. “Nymphs have only ever been bonded to Lycans.”
“So why change that now? What makes me different? Why is she punishing me for not wanting to be with her monster of a son?” I bring my knees up to my chest. “How can I keep us safe when I can't access my power?”
“You may not feel it now but you are more powerful than any Nymph that has ever been. Gaia wouldn't leave us defenceless.” Her words say one thing but I can see the worry and doubt all over her face.
“You say that Gaia wouldn't leave us defenceless but then where was she when Hades attacked before? Why aren't all Nymphs as powerful as I am? That way they wouldn't be hunted by Hades and his Vampires.”
“I've asked that question many times and I still don't know.” She mutters. “But that is why she asked Zeus to make Lycans. They made a deal that Lycans would protect Nymphs so they can keep balance and in return Nymphs would always be fated to a Lycan.”
“Wow talk about arranged marriage.” I say sarcastically.
“It's the will of the gods.” She shrugs.
So why did Gaia break her deal? Surely Zeus isn't going to like that. He's known throughout history for having a temper. She's risked the wrath of the King of the Gods to set me up with her son. No wonder she took my powers away she bet everything on me! Fucking hell.
“I'm scared mum.” I croak as I wrap my arms around myself as tears roll down my cheeks.
My Mum folds her arms around me and I feel her kisses on my head. I curl myself into her as she squeezes me tighter. Like she can hold me together and make everything perfect with just one hug.
“It will all work out. Everything will be fine.” She says as she strokes my hair.
I want everything to be fine but I feel like I'm drowning in things I don't understand or have no control over. The pressure is pushing down on me and I don't know what I should do!
I sit back and look at my Mum and decide to just unleash everything going through my head because I can't hold it in any more.
“I don't understand how it will. I know Dad hopes Lukas and I will be mated but he doesn't know about Alistair. What if rejecting Alistairiswhat has blocked my powers? Then I can't keep you all safe. They'll all hate me if they knew and Dad would be devastated. I can't do that to them after what they've been through!
Then at the same time everyone says I need to stay here and never leave for the rest of my life because I need to protect the pack and the forest but I feel like I'm in a cage. How can I protect nature and keep balance when I'm just stuck here doing the same thing each and every day with no drive or purpose other than to be mated to Lukas and sire the next generation?
I know I should be grateful for the family that I have now and I am but I feel lost and trapped like I'm floating in the middle of the ocean.
The only thing that is certain is that Gaia wants me to be with her son but why? And How? His Dad wants us all dead and Alistair is a monster who kills and tortures. What would my life be like with him? Would we have a cottage with a white picket fence in the underworld and he would just drink my blood until I die shrouded in darkness?”
Mum brushes the tears from my cheeks as she looks at me with a sad smile.
“What makes you so certain that Alistair is truly a monster?” She says softly.
“How is he not after everything him and Hades have done?” I say in shock.
“Hades is the irredeemable monster. Alistair...I think there is some light in him and that's what Gaia wants you to find. Listen, he let you bring him to the brink of death so that youcould get your father back. He has a conscience. He knew that when we left him barely alive that he would face more torture at the hands of his father. Why if not for you?” She heaves a heavy sigh. “I understand Gaia's desperation to pull her son out of the darkness and she knows it won't be easy so she made you more powerful than any Nymph before so you can do the impossible. A Moira bond can only happen between two people if there is something there already drawing them together in the first place. It can't be placed on just anyone it needs a tether. You were drawn to him before you were bonded and despite knowing who and what he is now I know you are still drawn to him. You will never feel at home here or be happy with Lukas because deep down you want Alistair.
The message Gaia gave you, Fall into the darkness to find the light deep in its depths. I know she means Alistair. No mother could give up on their child and Gaia is no different. She loves him and she knows he can be saved.
No matter what you choose I will support you. Lukas is a good man and he will make a great Alpha especially with you by his side but Alistair will always be just a thought away and he is your fate. You will always be drawn to him and you can be his salvation. Who knows, together you could overthrow Hades for good.
As for your dad and the pack... I don't know. But your father and I have many years yet. The pack doesn't need a new alpha any time soon and sweetheart, I know you. You won't be happy in this life. Like you said you feel trapped and without a purpose. There is a path full of purpose right in front of you. You just need to start the walk down it.”
I hear the break in her voice though she tries to hide it. I know she has tears in her eyes but so do I. This is what I needed to hear. All I ever needed was to talk to my mum and I squeeze her even tighter.
“I love you mum.”
“I love you too baby.”
